Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Wrong Turn 3: Left for Dead (2009)

Director: Declan O'Brien

Starring: Tom Frederic, Janet Montgomery, Gil Kolirin, Christian Contreras, Jake Curran, Tom McKay, Charles Venn, tamer Hassan, Jack Gordon, Louise Cliffe, Charley Speed, Borislav Petrov, Borislav Lliev

More info: IMDb

Tagline: What You Don't See Will Kill You

Plot: While rafting in the Bluefish River area, four college kids are attacked by the mutant cannibal hillbilly Three Finger. Only the teenager Alex succeeds in escaping running through the woods. Meanwhile, a group of dangerous criminals are transported from the West Virginia Grafton Penitentiary in a custody bus escorted by three security guards through the backwoods. When they park in a rest stop in a police station, Sheriff Carver is informed about the missing teenagers. The bus driver heads to their destination with the guards and the prisoners but a tow truck driven by Three Finger hits the bus that falls off the road. They are attacked by Three Finger and the perilous Carlo Chavez dominates the guards and the other prisoners. When they accidentally meet Alex, the girl tells how sick and threatening Three Finger is; sooner the survivals discover that Alex is telling the truth.

My rating: 3/10

Will I watch it again? No.

When I watch a movie called WRONG TURN 3: LEFT FOR DEAD I'm looking for escapism but for fuck's sake.  The retarded inbreds in this flick are phenomenal killing machines.  Their expertise with a bow and arrow are rivaled only by Robin Hood.  The business with the criminals is boring.  I didn't care about any of them and what's worse, two of the people I thought would be left standing were so there was hardly a payoff.  Ugh.  And I know that corn syrup is the cheapest and easiest way to make fake blood but it's so obvious they used that.  In some scenes it's translucent for crying out loud.  I'm just picking at this point.  If they're going to keep on with this series would it be too much to ask to tone it down on the inbred bullshit and get some cold hearted killers loose in the woods that aren't so damned cliched?  Oh, and the nudity?


It's front loaded.  You get a small bit near the end so if that's your reason for watching it, skip the rest after the first kill of the picture and move onto something else.

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