Sunday, August 8, 2010

Death Hunt (1981)

Director: Peter R. Hunt

Starring: Charles "Badass" Bronson, Lee "Badass" Marvin, Carl "Badass" Weathers, Ed "Badass" Lauter, Angie "See me naked in BIG BAD MAMA but not in this picture" Dickinson and William "Not so much of a physical badass but more of a great character actor kind of badass" Sanderson.

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: The Saga Of Two Rivals Who Clash As Enemies And Triumph As Heroes.

Plot: Canada 1931: The unsociable trapper Johnson lives for himself in the ice-cold mountains near the Yukon river. During a visit in the town he witnesses a dog-fight. He interrupts the game and buys one of the dogs - almost dead already - for $200 against the owner's will. When the owner Hasel complains to Mountie Sergeant Millen, he refuses to take action. But then the loathing breeder and his friends accuse Johnson of murder. So Millen, although sympathetic, has to try to take him under arrest - but Johnson defends his freedom in every way possible.

My Rating: 8/10

Would I watch it again? Fuck, YEAH!

#71 on Project: Badass Charles Bronson

LEVEL OF BADASSICITY (10 being the highest): 10

Here's another quiet, calculating and lethal Charles Bronson picture, and like most of his films that came before, this kicks all kinds of testosterone-laden ASS! What's that? You need more manliness in your action movie? How about tossing in Lee Marvin? Would that satisfy you? Wanna know why they are never in the same shot together? It's 'cause there weren't any cameras available in 1981 that were strong enough to handle it! That's why! They'd break the instant the two of them appeared together. True story.


What else is a true story is apparantly what this film is based on. I'm sure there were a LOT of liberties taken. They probably had to make up a bunch of shit because the real story was probably way too weak and easily believable with a guy like Bronson in the lead. Audiences would expect Bronson to have done all that shit on the way to the outhouse to take a piss. I'll bet Bronson's real-life adventures would pale the true story behind his character.


Having said that...WHAT THE FUCK WAS ANGIE DICKINSON DOING IN THIS PICTURE??? Her character is pointless...except for the love scene where Lee Marvin shreds her into submission. At 96 years old he still had it. JFK fucked her. Sinatra fucked her. You can now add Lee Marvin to that list. It's a good thing for those other two fellas that Marvin didn't have her first when he was younger. Her drapes would probably still be dragging the floor after that session. Seriously! Why was she in this thing? Was it to keep this from being a total sausagefest? There's not a doubt in my mind that if she had a three-way with Marvin and Bronson, this would have happened to her...

You know it to be true!

Now, do I really need to talk about the actual film? No. This is all you need to know. Now go watch it.

Oh, OK, so how about this? Peter Hunt's (director) directorial debut was one of the absolute best Bond pictures...EVER...ON HER MAJESTY'S SECRET SERVICE (1969)!!! SUCK IT, QUANTUM OF SOLACE's director guy!

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