Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Bill Maher: Victory Begins at Home (2003)


Director: John Moffitt

Starring: Bill Maher

More info: IMDb

Plot: Comedian Bill Maher's Tony Award-nominated Broadway standup show, Bill Maher: Victory Begins at Home, will return to New York, July 17-19, 2003. The final performance at the Hudson Theatre (which is not technically a Broadway house though it's in the midtown theatre district) will be filmed live for HBO. In the show, Maher addresses contemporary political, social and cultural topics -- Iraq, President Bush and the so called Axis of Evil. The opinionated Maher said about Victory Begins at Home: "We've heard everything about the War on Terrorism except what we can actually do to help win it. The government used to do that for us through propaganda (the positive kind) posters, so taking my cue from the great old posters of World War I and World War II ('Loose Lips Sink Ships,' 'Buy War Bonds,' 'Plant a Victory Garden,' etc.) I commissioned artists to paint the posters our government today should be putting out to help us win this war."



My Rating: 7.5/10

Will I watch it again? Nah.

#13 on Stand-up Comedy Month, May 2012

Bill Maher is one of those comedians that you either love or hate. He's political so that automatically makes him divisive. Most people leaning to the right, politically, will disagree with most of what he has to say but they would also find some common ground on which to agree. I've always like his style. He's got a sense of wonder to him although he's gotten less "wow" and more angry as the years go on. He's a smart guy and he's got a sharp, quick wit. This particular performance is just like an extended version of what he does on his show, REAL TIME WITH BILL MAHER, so even though I enjoyed it, I can always get more from the show. Making jokes about politics isn't exactly timeless. You have to know the subject in order to understand the humor. How will this play out in another twenty years? Not well for anyone under the age of 30. At that point it'll just be an interesting time capsule but a very funny one.

Raw Deal (1986)


Director: John Irvin

Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Kathryn Harrold, Darren McGavin, Sam Wanamaker, Paul Shenar, Steven Hill, Joe Regaibuto, Robert Davi, Ed Lauter

More info: IMDb

Tagline: The government gave him a raw deal. Nobody gives him a raw deal.

Plot: Mark Kaminsky is kicked out of the FBI for his rough treatment of a suspect. He winds up as the sheriff of a small town in North Carolina. FBI Chief Harry Shannon, whose son has been killed by a mobster named Patrovina, enlists Kaminsky in a personal vendetta with a promise of reinstatement into the FBI if Patrovina is taken down. To accomplish this, Kaminsky must go undercover and join Patrovina's gang.



My rating: 6.5/10

Will I watch it again? Probably not.

I remember seeing this in the theater way back when and liking it like most 17 year olds did back then. That was 26 years ago. I still like it. Although it's by no means a great flick, it's still a good deal of fun and Arnold is 87.4 times better in it than he was in RED HEAT (1988). After watching this one it makes me want to lower RH's score as this picture is tons more fun than that one. It's great to see Darren McGavin in anything (I forgot he was in it) and Davi is always fun and menacing as a villain but the real star is Arnold. You get the idea that he's actually having a good time on the set and he's a lot more relaxed and jovial than usual. Overall it's got plenty of action and enough fun characters, dialogue and situations to keep you entertained for nearly a couple of hours. Now that I'm thinking about it, I would have LOVED to see Jack Palance or John Vernon in the role of the mob boss. That would kick this up to a 7.5.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Fanboys (2009)


Director: Kyle Newman

Starring: Sam Huntington, Chris Marquette, Dan Fogler, Jay Baruchel, Kristen Bell, David Denman, Christopher McDonald, Charlie B. Brown, Seth Rogen, Danny Trejo, Billy Dee Williams, William Shatner, Carrie Fisher, Kevin Smith, Jason Mewes, Ray Park, Ethan Suplee

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Never tell them the odds.

Plot: "Star Wars" fanatics take a cross-country trip to George Lucas' Skywalker Ranch so their dying friend can see a screening of STAR WARS: EPISODE 1: THE PHANTOM MENACE (1999) before its release.



My rating: 8/10

Will I watch it again? YES!!!

This one took me by surprise. When I heard the premise a couple of years ago it sounded goofy and potentially fun. I had no idea it was as clever and geekily hysterical it really was. I enjoyed the hell out of it. There are in-jokes for STAR WARS fans all over the place and they even have some fun at the expense of some Trekkers but if you're one of them, don't worry because you'll get one howlingly huge laugh from a brilliantly funny cameo by a certain someone who turns out to be integral to the plot. I about pissed myself. It's as good as the surprise cameo in ZOMBIELAND (2009). Don't watch the trailer if you want it to stay a surprise. I didn't know going into it and I about pissed myself with laughter when he showed up. STAR WARS fans, especially those of us who were there from the very beginning in '77 will eat this shit up and come back for seconds.

Jeff Dunham: Spark of Insanity (2007)


Director: Michael Simon

Starring: Jeff Dunham

More info: IMDb

Plot: Washington, D.C.'s historic Warner Theater is the stage for this sold-out performance by ventriloquist virtuoso Jeff Dunham and his host of hilarious characters, known collectively as the "suitcase posse." Joining regular posse members such as Peanut, Walter, Sweet Daddy Dee, Jose JalapeƱo and Bubba J are Dunham's newest character creations, Achmed the Dead Terrorist and Melvin the Superhero.



My rating: 7.5/10

Will I watch it again? Nah, but I am keen to see his other work.

#12 on Stand-up Comedy Month, May 2012

I loves me some good ventriloquist acts. I have ever since I was a little kid back in the 70s. There was some ventriloquist special around '79 or '80 that featured a whole bunch of greats like Edgar Bergen and a bunch of great talent that I've forgotten about since it was over 30 years ago and I haven't seen it since (I'd be much obliged if anyone can tell me what the name of that special was so I can locate it). Dunham starts out with about 20 minutes of stand-up which is pretty funny before moving onto his many puppet characters. My favorite is probably Achmed because he's the edgiest and non politically correct. My least favorite was Melvin. I don't think I laughed once during that bit. Nobody does stupid dummies better than Bergen's but that's not why I didn't like Melvin. I just didn't find him funny. Everything else was great, though. I'm looking forward to seeing more of this guy.

Jerry Seinfeld: I'm Telling You for the Last Time (1998)


Director: Marty Callner

Starring: Jerry Seinfeld

More info: IMDb

Plot: Live from New York City, Jerry Seinfeld, aided and abetted by a host of friends and fellow comedians, performs his 1998 Emmy-nominated performance on Broadway.



My rating: 9/10

Will I watch it again? Yeah.

#11 on Stand-up Comedy Month, May 2012

I caught Seinfeld's act in New Orleans probably around '93. He puts on a great show. There are several bits in this concert that I heard earlier but they're still funny. He's a pro. No doubt about that. He's the essence that was stand-up comedy in the 1980s. His bits are polished to perfection and his use of expressions and body movement accentuate the jokes. The business at the beginning, the funeral, had me in stitches. It's brilliant. I'm a fan of every one of those comedians, especially Shandling, Larry Miller and George Wallace. I could watch their stuff for days. The only thing I found 'not great' about this is how abrupt Seinfeld's concert ended. He didn't cap it with a callback or a definitive gut buster. It just ended. Despite that, I still dig it and I'll come back to it although I will miss "who are these people?" and "I mean, hey! Who are the ad wizards that came up with that one?" and "what's the deal?".

Chris Rock: Kill the Messenger (2008)


Director: Marty Callner

Starring: Chris Rock

More info: IMDb

Tagline: South Africa, London, New York... HBO

Plot: An HBO special edited from three performances from Chris Rock's 2008 comedy tour: London (dark suit, dark shirt), Johannesburg (black suit, white shirt) and New York (shiny jacket). Topics include the ongoing presidential campaign, the possibility of a black president, George W. Bush, gas prices, low-paid jobs, ringtones and bottled water, sex, relationships and the correct use of the n-word.



My rating: 8/10

Will I watch it again? YES!

#10 on Stand-up Comedy Month, May 2012

I've always loved Rock's delivery and style. Besides being very, very funny he's also very likable. He smiles a lot and that goes a long ways. Not much else to say except this performance is funny as shit. There were times where they would extend a bit by going to each of the 3 concerts. That was kind of neat. It would be interesting to see those concerts in full. I have a feeling it would have been just as good instead of being different. Regardless, this is a must for Chris Rock fans. Duh.

Monday, May 14, 2012

Drive-In Delirium Vol. 2


The very day I found out this series existed I discovered www.umbrellaent.com.au. This Australian DVD mail order company was the only place I could find these AMAZING collections of kick ass movie trailers and at a reasonable price. The DRIVE-IN DELIRIUM series is produced by them in Australia and are region 2 so don't expect to see them on the shelves here in the USA. You'll need to find yourself a player that will play the PAL format discs. You can get PAL players that are region-free on ebay for a song. They'll play any DVD from anywhere around the world. It's worth spending $40 for a player just to view these. WOW!!! And I thought volume 1 was amazing!!!

Anyway, I bought volumes 1 and 2 at once and started watching them the day they arrived. I'm a movie trailer junkie and each volume has 4 DVDs with 3 hours of trailers on each one bringing you about 300 trailers and lasting about 12 hours. I instantly had 24 hours of trailers to savor - some I've seen and some I hadn't. This is the end-all, be-all of movie trailer compilations. I was hoping to finish a trailer project disc before adding this, volume 2, but the 3rd volume was released last week and it arrived today so I'm taking a short break from yard work and I'm starting to list volume 2. In a couple of hours I'm going shower, pour myself a damn fine cocktail, kick my dogs up and delve into volume 3. Umbrella Entertainment, I LOVE YOU!

DISC 1

01) REVIEW - TRAILER - Blood and Black Lace
02) REVIEW - TRAILER - One on Top of the Other
03) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Bird with the Crystal Plumage
04) REVIEW - TRAILER - Hatchet for the Honeymoon
05) REVIEW - TRAILER - Black Belly of the Tarantula
06) REVIEW - TRAILER - Cat O' Nine Tails
07) REVIEW - TRAILER - Four Flies on Grey Velvet
08) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Fifth Cord
09) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Night Evelyn Came Out of the Grave
10) REVIEW - TRAILER - Death Walks on High Heels
11) REVIEW - TRAILER - Seven Blood-Stained Orchids
12) REVIEW - TRAILER - What Have You Done to Solange?
13) REVIEW - TRAILER - All the Colours of the Dark
14) REVIEW - TRAILER - Who Saw Her Die?
15) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Case of the Bloody Iris
16) REVIEW - TRAILER - Death Smiles at Murder
17) REVIEW - TRAILER - Torso
18) REVIEW - TRAILER - Spasmo
19) REVIEW - TRAILER - Eyeball
20) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Night Train Murders
21) REVIEW - TRAILER - Strip Nude for Your Killer
22) REVIEW - TRAILER - Autopsy
23) REVIEW - TRAILER - Deep Red
24) REVIEW - TRAILER - Suspiria
25) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Pyjama Girl Case
26) REVIEW - TRAILER - Inferno
27) REVIEW - TRAILER - Macabre
28) REVIEW - TRAILER - Tenebre
29) REVIEW - TRAILER - The New York Ripper
30) REVIEW - TRAILER - A Blade in the Dark
31) REVIEW - TRAILER - Murder Rock
32) REVIEW - TRAILER - Phenomena
33) REVIEW - TRAILER - Opera
34) REVIEW - TRAILER - Off Balance
35) REVIEW - TRAILER - Phantom of Death
36) REVIEW - TRAILER - Hitcher in the Dark

WE ARE GOING TO EAT YOU

37) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Man from Deep River
38) REVIEW - TRAILER - Last Cannibal World
39) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Last Survivor
40) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Mountain of the Cannibal God (1978)
41) REVIEW - TRAILER - Cannibal Holocaust
42) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Savage Island
43) REVIEW - TRAILER - Eaten Alive
44) REVIEW - TRAILER - Cannibal Ferox
45) REVIEW - TRAILER - Cannibal Terror
46) REVIEW - TRAILER - Massacre in Dinosaur Valley
47) REVIEW - TRAILER - Cut and Run
48) REVIEW - TRAILER - Tombs of the Blind Dead
49) REVIEW - TRAILER - Ghost Galleon
50) REVIEW - TRAILER - Zombies 2
51) REVIEW - TRAILER - Zombi Holocaust
52) REVIEW - TRAILER - City of the Living Dead
53) REVIEW - TRAILER - Nightmare City
54) REVIEW - TRAILER - Contamination
55) REVIEW - TRAILER - Hell of the Living Dead
56) REVIEW - TRAILER - Zombie's Lake
57) REVIEW - TRAILER - House by the Cemetery
58) REVIEW - TRAILER - Nights of Terror
59) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Beyond
60) REVIEW - TRAILER - After Death
61) REVIEW - TRAILER - Killing Birds

DON'T!

62) REVIEW - TRAILER - Don't Look in the Basement
63) REVIEW - TRAILER - Don't Open the Window
64) REVIEW - TRAILER - Don't Open the Door
65) REVIEW - TRAILER - Don't Answer the Phone
66) REVIEW - TRAILER - Don't Go in the House
67) REVIEW - TRAILER - Don't Go Near the Park

DISC 2

BRITISH BLOOD & BOSOMS

68) REVIEW - TRAILER - Corruption (1968)
69) REVIEW - TRAILER - Witchfinder General (1968)
70) REVIEW - TRAILER - Mumsy, Nanny, Sonny & Girly
71) REVIEW - TRAILER - And Soon the Darkness
72) REVIEW - TRAILER - Scream and Scream Again
73) REVIEW - TRAILER - Goodbye Gemini
74) REVIEW - TRAILER - Fright
75) REVIEW - TRAILER - Fear in the Night (1972)
76) REVIEW - TRAILER - Dr. Jeckyl and Sister Hyde (1971)
77) REVIEW - TRAILER - Blood from the Mummy's Tomb (1971)
78) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Vampire Lovers (1970)
79) REVIEW - TRAILER - Countess Dracula (1971)
80) REVIEW - TRAILER - Vampire Circus (1972)
81) REVIEW - TRAILER - Dracula AD 1972 (1972)
82) REVIEW - TRAILER - Captain Kronos: Vampire Hunter (1974)
83) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Blood on Satan's Claw (1971)
84) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Abominable Dr. Phibes (1971)
85) REVIEW - TRAILER - Dr. Phibes Rises Again (1972)
86) REVIEW - TRAILER - Virgin Witch
87) REVIEW - TRAILER - Tower of Evil
88) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Flesh and Blood Show (1972)
89) REVIEW - TRAILER - Raw Meat (1972)
90) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Asphyx (1973)
91) REVIEW - TRAILER - The House that Dripped Blood (1971)
92) REVIEW - TRAILER - Vault of Horror (1973)
93) REVIEW - TRAILER - From Beyond the Grave
94) REVIEW - TRAILER - And Now the Screaming Starts
95) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Wicker Man (1973)
96) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Mutations (1974)
97) REVIEW - TRAILER - Madhouse
98) REVIEW - TRAILER - The House of Whipcord
99) REVIEW - TRAILER - Frightmare
100) REVIEW - TRAILER - Killer's Moon

SEXY FOR SATAN

101) REVIEW - TRAILER - Succubus
102) REVIEW - TRAILER - Mark of the Devil
103) REVIEW - TRAILER - Werewolf Vs. Vampire Woman
104) REVIEW - TRAILER - Vampyros Lesbos (1971)
105) REVIEW - TRAILER - Daughters of Darkness (1971)
106) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Vampire Happening (1971)
107) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Devil's Nightmare (1971)
108) REVIEW - TRAILER - Caged Virgins
109) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Shiver of the Vampire (1971)
110) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Curse of the Devil
111) REVIEW - TRAILER - Veil of Blood (1973)
112) REVIEW - TRAILER - The House of Exorcism
113) REVIEW - TRAILER - Nude for Satan (1974)
114) REVIEW - TRAILER - Manhattan Baby
115) REVIEW - TRAILER - Demons (1985)

A FISTFUL OF EUROS

116) REVIEW - TRAILER - A Bullet for the General (1966)
117) REVIEW - TRAILER - Django (1966)
118) REVIEW - TRAILER - Django Kill
119) REVIEW - TRAILER - Any Gun Can Play
120) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Hellbenders
121) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Great Silence (1968)
122) REVIEW - TRAILER - A Name that Cried Revenge
123) REVIEW - TRAILER - Run Man Run
124) REVIEW - TRAILER - 100 Rifles
125) REVIEW - TRAILER - Matalo (1970)
126) REVIEW - TRAILER - Companeros (1970)
127) REVIEW - TRAILER - Red Sun (1971)
128) REVIEW - TRAILER - Hannie Caulder
129) REVIEW - TRAILER - A Man Called Sledge (1970)
130) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Deserter
131) REVIEW - TRAILER - Bad Man's River
132) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Man Called Noon
133) REVIEW - TRAILER - Four of the Apocalypse
134) REVIEW - TRAILER - Keoma
135) REVIEW - TRAILER - A Man Called Blade
136) REVIEW - TRAILER - Comin' At Ya 3D

DISC 3

SATAN MADE ME DO IT

137) REVIEW - TRAILER - Witchcraft 70
138) REVIEW - TRAILER - Devil Woman
139) REVIEW - TRAILER - Mark of the Witch
140) REVIEW - TRAILER - Blood Orgy of the She Devils
141) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Other
142) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Night Child
143) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Pyx
144) REVIEW - TRAILER - Beyond the Door
145) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Devil Times Five
146) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Devil Within Her
147) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Devil's Rain (1975)
148) REVIEW - TRAILER - Race with the Devil
149) REVIEW - TRAILER - God Told Me To (1976)
150) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Omen (1976)
151) REVIEW - TRAILER - To the Devil a Daughter
152) REVIEW - TRAILER - Exorcist 2: The Heretic (1977)
153) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Car (1977)
154) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Sentinel (1977)
155) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Child
156) REVIEW - TRAILER - Nurse Sherri
157) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Legacy
158) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Hearse
159) REVIEW - TRAILER - Fear No Evil
160) REVIEW - TRAILER - Evilspeak
161) REVIEW - TRAILER - Demonoid
162) REVIEW - TRAILER - Deadly Blessing
163) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Evil Dead (1981)
164) REVIEW - TRAILER - Evil Dead 2
165) REVIEW - TRAILER - Children of the Corn (1984)
166) REVIEW - TRAILER - Maximum Overdrive
167) REVIEW - TRAILER - Hellraiser (1987)
168) REVIEW - TRAILER - Hellraiser 2: Hellbound
169) REVIEW - TRAILER - Prince of Darkness
170) REVIEW - TRAILER - Night of the Demons

SPOOKED

171) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Legend of Hell House
172) REVIEW - TRAILER - The House on Skull Mountain
173) REVIEW - TRAILER - Burnt Offerings (1976)
174) REVIEW - TRAILER - House By the Lake
175) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Evil (1978)
176) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Amityville Horror (1979)
177) REVIEW - TRAILER - Amityville 2: The Possession (1982)
178) REVIEW - TRAILER - Amityville 3D (1983)
179) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Fog (1980)
180) REVIEW - TRAILER - Death Ship
181) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Changeling
182) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Entity
183) REVIEW - TRAILER - Ghost Story
184) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Survivor
185) REVIEW - TRAILER - Sole Survivor
186) REVIEW - TRAILER - The House Where Evil Dwells
187) REVIEW - TRAILER - House (1986)
188) REVIEW - TRAILER - Prison

THE CREATURE WASN'T NICE

189) REVIEW - TRAILER - Night of the Bloody Apes
190) REVIEW - TRAILER - Trog
191) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Incredible 2-Headed Transplant
192) REVIEW - TRAILER - Beast of Blood
193) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Twilight People
194) REVIEW - TRAILER - Invasion of the Bee Girls
195) REVIEW - TRAILER - It's Alive (1974)
196) REVIEW - TRAILER - They Came from Within
197) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Stepford Wives
198) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Island of Dr. Moreau
199) REVIEW - TRAILER - Mighty Peking Man
200) REVIEW - TRAILER - Demon Seed
201) REVIEW - TRAILER - Slithis
202) REVIEW - TRAILER - Prey
203) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Manitou
204) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Brood
205) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Dark
206) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Being (1983)
207) REVIEW - TRAILER - It Came Without Warning
208) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Unseen
209) REVIEW - TRAILER - Mindwarp
210) REVIEW - TRAILER - Humanoids from the Deep (1980)
211) REVIEW - TRAILER - Blood Beach
212) REVIEW - TRAILER - Inseminoid
213) REVIEW - TRAILER - Incubus
214) REVIEW - TRAILER - Superstition
215) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Beast Within
216) REVIEW - TRAILER - Parasite
217) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Thing
218) REVIEW - TRAILER - Creepshow (1982)
219) REVIEW - TRAILER - Creepshow 2 (1987)
220) REVIEW - TRAILER - Humungus
221) REVIEW - TRAILER - Basket Case (1982)
222) REVIEW - TRAILER - Xtro
223) REVIEW - TRAILER - C.H.U.D.
224) REVIEW - TRAILER - Mutant
225) REVIEW - TRAILER - Lifeforce (1985)
226) REVIEW - TRAILER - Critters
227) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Curse
228) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Hidden (1987)
229) REVIEW - TRAILER - Dolls
230) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Blob
231) REVIEW - TRAILER - Neon Maniacs
232) REVIEW - TRAILER - They Live
233) REVIEW - TRAILER - Brain Damage (1988)

DISC 4

COSMIC CARNAGE & FUNKED-UP FUTURES

234) REVIEW - TRAILER - Planet of the Vampires (1965)
235) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Green Slime
236) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Mysterious Island of Captain Nemo
237) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Land That Time Forgot
238) REVIEW - TRAILER - The People That Time Forgot
239) REVIEW - TRAILER - At the Earth's Core
240) REVIEW - TRAILER - Warlords of Atlantis
241) REVIEW - TRAILER - Beyond Atlantis
242) REVIEW - TRAILER - Yor: The Hunter from the Future
243) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Bed Sitting
244) REVIEW - TRAILER - No Blade of Grass
245) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Last Days of Man on Earth
246) REVIEW - TRAILER - Zardoz
247) REVIEW - TRAILER - Silent Running
248) REVIEW - TRAILER - Dark Star
249) REVIEW - TRAILER - A Boy and His Dog
250) REVIEW - TRAILER - Flesh Gordon
251) REVIEW - TRAILER - Star Crash
252) REVIEW - TRAILER - Message from Space
253) REVIEW - TRAILER - Galaxina
254) REVIEW - TRAILER - Saturn 3
255) REVIEW - TRAILER - Battle Beyond the Stars
256) REVIEW - TRAILER - Space Raiders
257) REVIEW - TRAILER - Escape from New York
258) REVIEW - TRAILER - Android
259) REVIEW - TRAILER - Mad Max
260) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Chain Reaction
261) REVIEW - TRAILER - The New Barbarians
262) REVIEW - TRAILER - 1990: The Bronx Warriors
263) REVIEW - TRAILER - Megaforce
264) REVIEW - TRAILER - Turkey Shoot
265) REVIEW - TRAILER - Raiders of Atlantis
266) REVIEW - TRAILER - Metalstorm
267) REVIEW - TRAILER - Treasure of the Four Crowns
268) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai
269) REVIEW - TRAILER - Dead End Drive-In
270) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Peris of Gwendoline
271) REVIEW - TRAILER - Strange Invaders
272) REVIEW - TRAILER - Invaders from Mars
273) REVIEW - TRAILER - Cherry 2000
274) REVIEW - TRAILER - Wizards
275) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Beastmaster
276) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Sword & the Sorcerer
277) REVIEW - TRAILER - Sorceress
278) REVIEW - TRAILER - Conquest
279) REVIEW - TRAILER - Fire and Ice
280) REVIEW - TRAILER - Barbarian Queen

THE HARD NAKED TRUTH

281) REVIEW - TRAILER - Venus in Furs
282) REVIEW - TRAILER - Space Thing
283) REVIEW - TRAILER - Female Animal
284) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Depraved
285) REVIEW - TRAILER - 3 Dimensions of Greta
286) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Seduction of Inga
287) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Curious Female
288) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Secrets of Sex
289) REVIEW - TRAILER - Alvin Purple
290) REVIEW - TRAILER - Hungry Pets
291) REVIEW - TRAILER - Panorama Blue
292) REVIEW - TRAILER - 2069: A Sex Odyssey
293) REVIEW - TRAILER - Bibi: Confessions of Sweet Sixteen
294) REVIEW - TRAILER - Lola
295) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Swinging Cheerleaders
296) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Naughty Stewardesses
297) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Story of O
298) REVIEW - TRAILER - Supervixens
299) REVIEW - TRAILER - Wham Bam Thank You Spaceman
300) REVIEW - TRAILER - The Italian Stallion
301) REVIEW - TRAILER - Chatter Box
302) REVIEW - TRAILER - Let Me Die a Woman
303) REVIEW - TRAILER - Sister Emanuelle
304) REVIEW - TRAILER - Adventures of a Plumber's Mate
305) REVIEW - TRAILER - ABC of Love and Sex
306) REVIEW - TRAILER - Felicity
307) REVIEW - TRAILER - Spaced Out

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Damien: Omen II (1978)




Director: Don Taylor

Starring: William Holden, Lee Grant, Jonathan Scott-Taylor, Robert Foxworth, Nicholas Pryor, Lew Ayres, Sylvia Sidney, Lance Henriksen

More info: IMDb

Tagline: The first time was only a warning.

Plot: Damien the Antichrist, now age 13, finally learns of his destiny under the guidance of an unholy disciple of Satan. Meanwhile dark mystical forces begin to eliminate all those who suspect the child's true identity.



My rating: 7/10

Will I watch it again? YES.

Maybe it's that William Holden stars instead of Gregory Peck that makes this sequel as good as the first. Holden always felt like he was more of a regular guy than Peck who came off stuffy. OK, so that's not the biggest reason to dig on this flick. The kills are great and, although maybe not as iconographic as they were in the first movie, there's one that stands out by far and it's the under-the-ice drowning. HOLY FUCKING SHIT was that badass!!!


But THE most important aspect to the entire trilogy (I know there was a fourth but I haven't seen it yet and it really doesn't belong with the true trilogy) is Jerry Goldsmith's brilliantly eerie score. They get better as the series goes along and to listen to all three soundtracks in order is astounding as it works as one long black mass (slight exaggeration but it really is a brilliant few hours' worth of music). It's been less than a decade since I watched the trilogy (I probably watch them once every 8-10 years). I'm looking forward to getting to the third picture. It's the weakest of the three but shit, it's got Sam Neil and a kick ass and dark as hell Jerry Goldsmith score.








Chonda Pierce: This Ain't Prettyville (2009)




Director: David Higby

Starring: Chonda Pierce

More info: IMDb

Plot: Southern Christian comedian, Chonda Pierce, tells jokes on stage, brings the audience down to the bummer basement and throws in some uplifting songs and weak skits along the way.



My rating: 4/10

Will I watch it again? No.

#9 on Stand-up Comedy Month, May 2012

Did you know that there is such a thing called the Christian Comedy Association? I didn't until just now when I was trying to find out anything on Pierce. I'm learning all kinds of stuff these days. I picked up her 3 stand-up DVDs for a buck apiece. I initially passed on them because it looked like she was a religious comic. I'm an atheist so I'm not going to buy into what she's selling but then the part of me that's a HUGE fan of stand-up comedy (when it's good, mind you) that made me go back and get them. Even though I don't believe in all that nonsense maybe, just maybe, she's really funny and can make me laugh. I should have stuck with my initial reaction.


Not only did I not laugh, but I was annoyed. For someone who is a professional comedian, she takes longer to tell a story then she needs to. And this is coming from a guy who can take forever to tell a story. Anyway, the show opens with a song, This Ain't Prettyville. Ugh. You can tell that she REALLY HATES alcohol. She takes a lot of jabs at how damaging it is and without anything funny to say about it. She even points out several times that she's not trying to be self-righteous...but then she'll say shit against booze in a way that makes her just that. I'm confused.


An hour in she brings it wayyyyyyy down by talking about how her older and younger sister died within months of each other and how her pastor father left the ministry. Talk about a buzz kill. Later she talks about going into rehab for depression. Hilarious! Not really. At least with the rehab segment she threw in some jokes. The audience just loved hearing about her family problems without the funny.



But if all of this wasn't enough, the worst part of it was hearing her squeaky, irritating voice for 92 minutes!!! This was a long show and she ended it like she started - with a song, one of those tent revival, hands to jesus songs. And to think I still have two more of these to get through. Ugh. At least she didn't get too religious-y in this one. THE target audience for Chonda Pierce is Southern Christian women. All others need not watch. This was painful. The whole thing was like a Baptist church service with the music and her bummer stories near the end serving as a sermon and then ending with more music. I'm so glad it's over.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Ironclad (2011)


Director: Jonathan English

Starring: James Purefoy, Brian Cox, Kate Mara, Derek Jacobi, Paul Giamatti, Charles Dance, Jason Flemyng, Jamie Foreman, Mackenzie Crook

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Heavy metal goes medieval

Plot: It is the year 1215 and the rebel barons of England have forced their despised King John to put his royal seal to the Magna Carta, a noble, seminal document that upheld the rights of free-men. Yet within months of pledging himself to the great charter, the King reneged on his word and assembled a mercenary army on the south coast of England with the intention of bringing the barons and the country back under his tyrannical rule. Barring his way stood the mighty Rochester castle, a place that would become the symbol of the rebel's momentous struggle for justice and freedom.



My rating: 6.5/10

Will I watch it again? Probably not.

Did this hit the theaters? I wish I had seen it on the big screen. For the most part I dug it. It's gory as hell and any fan of great melee fighting needs to see this. Limbs are lost, people hacked in half, lots of blood. It's great. I love the cast and the performances are good (Giamatti plays it to the hilt) although I though Purefoy's character should have had more to do. AND GODDAMNIT! WHY DOES THERE ALMOST ALWAYS HAVE TO BE A LOVE INTEREST??? I hate that shit. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. This is the latter. When you have a picture like this you shouldn't toss in a love scene just to pander to get women to see your movie. Gee fucking whiz! The picture's already two hours long. Cut out the 10 or more minutes of that subplot and make this a leaner, better film. Damn it, not I'm pissed off again. Shit. I'm lowering this from a 7 to a 6.5.

Assignment: Outer Space (1960)


Director: Antonio Margheriti

Starring: Rick Van Nutter, Gabriella Farinon, David Montresor, Archie Savage, Alain Dijon, Franco Fantasia, Joe Pollini

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Fear awaits ...... in the murky mists of outer space!

Plot: In the 21st century Ray Peterson, reporter for the Interplanetary News, is assigned to write a story aboard a space station. Tension mounts between Peterson and the station commander, who believes he is in the way, but has orders to leave him alone. Errant spaceship Alpha Two enters the solar system and its photon generators are radiating enough heat to destroy Earth as it approaches. It falls to Peterson to try to figure out a way to enter the spaceship, disarm the generators, and escape before suffocating.



My rating: 4/10

Will I watch it again? Nooooooo.

#27 on SCI-FI TRAILERS VOLUME 9 & 10 (part of the TRAILER TRASH PROJECT)

This about put me to sleep. It's a cheap Italian space opera with special effects on a budget but that's not what hurts the film. I can forgive a lot of things, and this has a decent story, but it's strange that there are very few likable characters. Most of them are kind of mean to one another. Then there's the seriousness of it all. Everyone needs to lighten up a little. The actors are taking this way to serious. The speeches (and there are lots of them) are given like the people who hand out awards are on the set. If that's not enough, it's just boring. This is in one of those 50 movie sets (sci-fi classics). It's worth having but gee whiz. Woof.


Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Katt Williams: Live (2006)


Director: Zo Wesson

Starring: Katt Williams

More info: IMDb

Plot: Katt Williams's first Comedy Special filmed in Katt's hometown of Cincinnati Ohio. In this raunchy, uncensored routine, Williams free associates on everything from sex, to fatherhood, to his presuppositions and disillusionment about life in the City of Angels.



My rating: 7/10

Will I watch it again? Nah.

#8 on Stand-up Comedy Month, May 2012

Until I came across 3 of his DVDs I had never heard of Katt Williams. I really like this guy. I like his delivery and his energy. And then there's the funny. I wasn't howlin' all over the place but I laughed more than usual. His bits on weed, 99 toys and fuckin' had me going pretty good. I'm looking forward to watching the other Katt DVDs.

The Wasp Woman (1959)




Director: Roger Corman

Starring: Susan Cabot, Anthony Eisley, Barboura Morris, William Roerick, Michael Mark, Frank Gerstle

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Horror Of The Winged Menace!

Plot: The founder and owner of a cosmetic factory, Janice Starlin (Susan Cabot), is concerned with the dropping sale results of her company. The scientist Eric Zinthrop (Michael Mark) offers to her his research with wasp enzymes that makes animals younger, and she immediately accepts to hire him, provided she becomes his human subject. She decides by her own to accelerate the treatment injecting additional serum trying to see earlier results, becoming the lethal "Wasp Woman".



My rating: 5/10

Will I watch it again? Nope.

#26 on SCI-FI TRAILERS VOLUME 9 & 10 (part of the TRAILER TRASH PROJECT)

At just 73 minutes, this Roger Corman flick is about what you'd expect. It's average, low budget horror entertainment. The problem is, the poster is WAY more exciting than the movie (typical) and there's very little Wasp Woman action. By the way, she doesn't look like the poster. It's a woman with a wasp head not the other way around. If you've seen low budget horror movies from the 50s then you know what you're in for and, like me, you'll probably find it a reasonable way to kill an hour and change.

Ron White: They Call Me Tater Salad (2004)


Director: Michael Drumm

Starring: Ron White

More info: IMDb

Plot: Ron White does an hour long standup routine about his life, things that bother him, and other thoughts.



My rating: 7.5/10

Will I watch it again? Yes.

#7 on Stand-up Comedy Month, May 2012

Goddamn this guy's funny. I only give this one a 7.5 because, while I think it's pretty damn funny, it's not as hilarious as YOU CAN'T FIX STUPID. I dig his delivery and that he smiles a lot. He genuinely looks like he's having just as much fun as the audience and that perception goes a long way in my book. His bit on cheating on his wife was great, and then there's getting thrown out of a bar and then there's deer hunting and then...

Blue Collar Comedy Tour: The Movie (2003)


Director: C.B. Harding

Starring: Jeff Foxworthy, Bil Engvall, Ron White, Larry the Cable Guy

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Like it or not, they're just like you.

Plot: In the summer of 2002, monster crowds lined up to see four headliners -- Jeff Foxworthy, Bill Engvall, Larry the Cable Guy and Ron White -- do what they do best: make people laugh with a Southern-fried twist. Even better, producers caught everything on their cameras, resulting in this fascinating concert film and behind-the-scenes documentary that's sure to become a classic among fans of all four comedians.



My rating: 7/10

Will I watch it again? Nah.

#6 on Stand-up Comedy Month, May 2012

Each comedian gets about 15 minutes of stand-up with some on-the-street comedy bits with them going to the mall, fishing, going to the spa, etc. Those bits were hit and miss and you could tell most of it was scripted but that's OK. They're likable enough to get some laughs out of me. I came for the stand-up routines. Ron White was first and of the four, he's my favorite. With only about 15 minutes to work with he didn't have much that I hadn't heard but that doesn't matter 'cause he's hilarious. Larry was next. I don't get the hate he receives. I think he's pretty damn funny. "There was a woman in a bikini contest that had one boob bigger than the other. She came in first and third place." I like his delivery. It's an act but then most comedians are putting on an act with a character.


Then there was Bill Engvall. I've heard of this guy for years but I've never heard his comedy. He was funny but not as much as the first two cats. Foxworthy was last. Like Engvall, he didn't bring the funny like Ron & Larry. He does that thing that most comedians do after they start making babies...talk about their fucking kids for most of their routine. I don't have kids and I ain't gonna start. I'm VERY content with that, too. Seriously, they'd cut into my social life way too much. Foxworthy does and he loves to tell you about it. He did make me laugh a few times but still, you know? The last 40 or so minutes had all four of them on the stage. It seemed like they were going to do a Q&A with the audience which would have been great but all they did was goad each other into telling stories showing that it was really just a chance for each of them to do a few more minutes of their routines. It's a good sampler of each of the comedians but I'd rather see them do an hour special than tease me with some funny.

The BackWoods (2006)


Director: Koldo Serra

Starring: Gary Oldman, Virginie Ledoyen, Paddy Considine, Aitana Sanchez-Gijon, Jon Aririo, Lluis Homar, Kandidio Uranga

More info: IMDb

Tagline: "There are only hunters and prey...that's the only fucking truth in this world!"

Plot: An idyllic stay in the Spanish countryside takes a nightmarish turn for two couples when they discover a feral girl chained inside an abandoned house and decide to turn her over to the authorities. But the real drama begins when locals armed with shotguns show up looking for the girl.



My rating: 7.5/10

Will I watch it again? Yes.

Here's flick that passed unnoticed under my radar that I'm glad I discovered. Gary Oldman in the woods getting fucked around with some redneck European locals? I'm on it! Oldman looks like he's fresh off the set of one of the BATMAN pictures sportin' that bushy mustache. The accent is naturally different but so is the attitude. He's kind of an alpha dick but he's likable. What a great actor. Anyway lots of shit goes down almost from the beginning. You can just tell in the first few minutes that things aren't going to be pretty - between the two couples and with the locals. Without spoiling anything, the ending is fucking great and I really appreciate how Oldman's character finishes the picture. It's so non-Hollywood and it felt like a breath of fresh air. Watch it. It's a fine exploitation-type movie with some great direction and acting.


Monday, May 7, 2012

Dave Chappelle: Killin' Them Softly (2000)


Director: Stan Lathan

Starring: Dave Chappelle

More info: IMDb

Plot: Dave Chappelle returns to D.C. and riffs on politics, police, race relations, drugs, Sesame Street and more.



My rating: 8/10

Will I watch it again? Nah. Once was fine.

#5 on Stand-up Comedy Month, May 2012

Man, it's been a long time since I saw his TV show. That was some seriously funny shit. His stand-up is great, too. I like his delivery and he had me laughing at least once through all of his different bits. I particularly like the bits on presidents and sex. Good stuff.

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Denis Leary: Lock 'N Load (1997)


Director: Ted Demme

Starring: Denis Leary

More info: IMDb

Plot: Actor/comic Denis Leary discusses family life, coffee, religion, and other topics in this stand-up special.



My rating: 4/10

Will I watch it again? Noop.

#4 on Stand-up Comedy Month, May 2012

I guess this makes it official...I don't like Leary's stand-up comedy. I still like him as an actor and personality but his stand-up just doesn't make me laugh. It's better than NO CURE FOR CANCER (1992) but only because he's not nearly as angry and spastic. Maybe it's because he now (as of '97) has kids. Beats me. I don't really care. I didn't laugh once.

Friday, May 4, 2012

Denis Leary: No Cure for Cancer (1992)


Director: Ted Demme

Starring: Denis Leary

More info: IMDb

Plot: Ticked off comic Denis Leary talks honestly about subjects ranging from smoking, red meat, drugs, his family, rehab, and yes, cancer.



My rating: 3/10

Will I watch it again? No. I laughed once.

#3 on Stand-up Comedy Month, May 2012

The set starts out with his infectious song, "Asshole", and then goes to his very fast, gravelly-voiced, angry, Robin-Williams-coked-up-1970s-energetic routine. He barely takes a breath until the end where he gets a little sombre talking about the death of his father and then it picks up, ending with a very obnoxious song. I really like Asshole. It's a fun tune. I really like Leary as a personality and actor. However, I did not like his stand-up. There's another of his concerts on the DVD, LOCK N' LOAD, to get through. I can only hope it's better. I don't recall ever hearing any of his routines before. It's a remarkable thing, though, that he's able to maintain that level of energy for that long without fucking up. He's easily one of (if not THE) faster-speaking comics and for just over an hour, that's a shitload of routine to spew out.

The Avengers (2012)




Director: Joss Whedon

Starring: Robert Downey Jr., Chris Evans, Mark Ruffalo, Chris Hemsworth, Scarlett Johansson, Jeremy Renner, Rom Hiddleston, Clark Gregg, Cobie Smulders, Stellan Skarsgard, Samuel L Jackson, Gwyneth Paltrow, Powers Boothe, Jenny Agutter, Harry Dean Stanton

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Some assembly required.

Plot: Nick Fury of S.H.I.E.L.D. brings together a team of super humans to form The Avengers to help save the Earth from Loki and his army.



My rating: 9/10

Will I watch it again? YES!!! As in next week!!!

HOLY SHIT!!! It's a home-fucking-run! There's so much to like. The way every character gets several moments to shine yet work as one as a team is remarkable. It's a perfect juggling act where not a single ball gets dropped but, instead, things get added like a bowling pin, trombone, chainsaw, etc. It's dangerous, it's funny, it's sad, it's punch-the-air exciting. It may slow down a bit much in the middle but boy, oh boy, does it make up for it in the final half hour.


I thought Edward Norton was great as Banner but Ruffalo bests him. I NEED to see another Hulk movie. PLEASE give us another Hulk picture. Renner as Hawkeye is fantastic. I really dig this guy. Hell, EVERYONE does a fantastic job. It felt like everyone had exactly the right amount of screen time and no one got slighted. There are so many nice touches thrown in right to the very end that Joss Whedon deserves a shitload of praise. He's pulled off what seemed impossible. I can't find any flaws except a slightly saggy midsection but then I was sleeepy as fuck and all the Coke in the world wasn't helping to keep me awake. You MUST stay through until the absolute end of the film. There are two surprises during the end credits. I'll go see it again in a few days but in 3D and I'll probably update this afterward.

UPDATE: 5/7/12 - I just got back from watching it in 3D and the 3D is outstanding. I haven't seen better 3D than this since AVATAR (2009). It's clear, smooth and well, let's just face it...Scarlett Johansson's butt in 3D (you know the scene I'm talking about - the one where she's interrogating Loki) is worth the price of the upgrade. I prefer the 3D on this flick over the 2D. I forgot to mention last week about how amazing the special effects are. There's barely any shaky cam and you get to see so much of the action in a way your eyes can soak it in. I love it. I also love Alan Silvestri's score. It's got a great superhero theme, the kind that you might find yourself humming out of the theater. It's something that's been missing from a lot of comic book movies in the past two decades. I'm not sure if I'll go see it again but I just might. I CANNOT WAIT until 6/8 for PROMETHEUS!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, May 3, 2012

X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)


Director: Brett Ratner

Starring: Hugh Jackman, Halle Berry, Ian McKellen, Patrick Stewart, Famke Janssen, Anna Paquin, Kelsey Grammer, James Marsden, Rebecca Romijn, Vinnie Jones

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Take a Stand

Plot: When a cure is found to treat mutations, lines are drawn amongst the X-Men, led by Professor Charles Xavier, and the Brotherhood, a band of powerful mutants organized under Xavier's former ally, Magneto.

My Rating: 7/10

Will I watch it again? Yes. Maybe I'll hate it less each time. So far so good.

My only previous viewing of this was opening weekend at the theater and I hated it. I didn't much care for any of it except how neat it was seeing Stewart and McKellen CGI-younger at the start and how quickly Magneto turned on Mystique (which remains my favorite scene). After two home runs with the previous films I guess I was hoping for a grand slam with this third and final film in the franchise with this cast. Not much has changed except that I no longer hate it. Mystique's fate is still my favorite scene and by a long shot. I still don't like Halle Berry in this picture. I just don't think she's that good of an actress.


Enough can't be said about how much acting weight Stewart and McKellen bring to this franchise. It's pitch-perfect casting and those two go a long way in keeping this flick from being leagues worse than it already is. My biggest issue I guess is the lack of any emotional weight when certain characters snuff it, particularly the first major death. I was stunned at how little I cared and the way they build this person up suggest we're not supposed to care but I doubt that. That's a film maker's problem for neglecting it. X-MEN 3 should have been longer. I realize it's not too far from being two hours long but it needed another half hour and some tweaking with the character development. You can tell they were trying but the whole thing feels rushed and that's a damn shame because so many hundreds (probably thousands) of people worked to make the first two films the best they could and this is how the story ends.

Love Ranch (2010)


Director: Taylor Hackford

Starring: Helen Mirren, Joe Pesci, Sergio Peris-Mencheta, Gina Gershon, Taryn Manning, Scout Taylor-Compton, Bai Ling, M.C. Gainey

More info: IMDb

Tagline: When It Comes To Love... Everyone Pays A Price.

Plot: In the mid-70s, near Reno, Grace Bontempo runs the Love Ranch, a legal brothel. Her husband Charlie, with big dreams, a felony record, and an aptitude for spending and infidelity, is the brothel's public face. On the day Grace's doctor tells her she has cancer in an advanced state, Charlie takes on new client, Argentine boxer Armando Bruza, Charlie's ticket to fame: he hopes to promote a fight with Ali. Because of Charlie's felonies, Grace is Bruza's titular manager. With the IRS and the church ladies circling the business, Grace takes the manager's role seriously and, along the way, Bruza charms her. Secrets play out: is there love at the Love Ranch? How will Charlie respond?



My rating: 7/10

Will I watch it again? Nope. Too many movies to get to before I die.

I don't know how this one escaped my attention but when I recently came across it in one of my bulk buys I was shocked to see that there was a recent Joe Pesci movie that also starred Hellen Mirren as a couple of pimps running a whorehouse in Nevada! That's all I need to know. And it's pretty good. If you're a fan of either actor then you're going to want to see this. Pesci plays it charming and cruel but not as bastardly as his work with Scorsese. Mirren is a beast of an actor and seeing these two play opposite each other was a treat. For the record, Hellen Mirren needs to have my babies.


See! Does that look like a broad who is 63? That's not from this movie but it was taken two years earlier. RANCH is also a pretty good crime picture that's not only well acted but well directed and the ending is very satisfying. Director Hackford has done some big pictures including THE DEVIL'S ADVOCATE (1997), one of the few Keanu Reeves movies I can take. Besides, this is the only picture Pesci has done since 1998! Check it out.

Drew Hastings: Irked & Miffed (2008)


Director: Michael Drumm

Starring: Drew Hastings

More info: IMDb

Plot: Drew Hastings' stand-up comedy special.



My rating: 6.5/10

Will I watch it again? Nah.

#2 on Stand-up Comedy Month, May 2012

I've only heard the name of Drew Hastings so his routines are new to me. He's a story teller comic, with tales of his adventures with his girlfriend, being 50, having a farm, etc. Hastings is very likable and is better than average but there really wasn't much to illicit big laughs from me except for this one bit...



THAT was hilarious. Maybe it's because I can totally identify with it. I dig this guy's style and should I come across any of his other stuff I'll give it a watch.