Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band (1978)

Director: Michael Schultz

Starring: The Bee Gees and everyone else in Hollywood without any common sense

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: A splendid time is guaranteed for all.

Plot: Small town band hits it big, but they must battle a nefarious plot in the music industry.

Here's the trailer but you can find a ton of clips on YouTube:

My Rating: 2/10 and that's being generous

Would I watch it again? Not even with somebody else's eyes

Remember those bubblegum card packs we used to get when we were kids? Like STAR WARS, THE BLACK HOLE, or whatever movie was hot that summer? And remember that thin rectangular strip of hard pink gum that came with it? And even though it smelled kinda good, you'd put it in your mouth and suddenly it tasted like semi-flavored cardboard and it would break apart as you tried to chew it which, despite your giving that gum a chance, you end up spitting it out because, in the end, it's a completely worthless piece of shit. That's this movie.

It's horrendously slow and just plain awful. I watched it with a bunch of friends thinking, "how bad could it be?". Well, at one point I hit the display to see how much time we had left since it seemed to be well over an hour at that point and it looked like it could be wrapping up. FUCK ME! WE'RE ONLY 40 MINUTES INTO IT AND THERE'S AN HOUR AND FIFTEEN MINUTES LEFT TO GO!! I started drinking heavily. I'm serious. I started drinking. By the time it was over I was hammered and I don't remember much about watching THE BLUES BROTHERS afterwards. I'm double pissed because I sat through this giant turd AND I missed the great film that followed. Fuck You, Bee Gees!

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