Chrome and Hot Leather (1971)

Director: Lee Frost

Starring: William "Badass Muthafucker" Smith, Tony Young, Marvin Gaye, Wes Bishop, Bobby "Monster Mash" Pickett

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: Don't muck around with a Green Beret's Mama! He'll take his chopper and ram it down your throat!

Plot: A Green Beret returns home from the Vietnam war to find that a gang of murderous bikers has killed his fiancee. He calls on several of his Green Beret buddies to come and help him take revenge on the gang.



My Rating: 4/10

Would I watch it again? Uh-ah

#74 on Dusk to Dawn Drive-In Trash-o-Rama Show Vol. 1 (part of the TRAILER TRASH PROJECT)

What a great tagline! What a great plot! You've got William Smith as the leader of a biker gang for fuck's sake! Great movie, huh? Nope. Not by a long shot.

What hurts this picture is the lead Green Beret, Tony Young as Mitch. He's as wooden as Al Gore and has as much emotional range as a Vegas hooker after drinking two roofie coladas. Then you add that to him and his Army buddies dress like gay bikers and ride Japanese dirt bikes pretending to be real bikers. They look like fancy lads when compared to William Smith's crew.

They even have a bike riding training montage on their dirt bikes set to a song called, "Butterfly Wings"!!!!!!!!!!!! Fags. No offense, of course. I don't mean to belittle gays by comparing them to these bozo losers. For what it's worth, the rest of the soundtrack is shitty, too.

THEN you toss on the fact that Mitch wants revenge but he doesn't want to kill anyone so he and the boys use Army training rounds and dummy smoke grenades to scare the bikers into submission. You go through this potentially ripe story, waiting patiently 'cause you just know there's going to be some serious bloodshed at the end of the picture and there isn't any. We were fucking pissed. I felt like that really ugly, lonely girl that goes out on her first date in years, gives HERSELF a roofie, and her date politely leaves without so much as a grope.