Just a Gigolo (1978)

Original title: Schoner Gigolo, Armer Gigolo

Director: David Hemmings

Writers: Ted Rose, Joshua Sinclair, Julius Brammer, Ennio De Concini, Irving Caesar

Composer: Gunther Fischer

Starring: David Bowie, Sydne Rome, Kim Novak, David Hemmings, Maria Schell, Curd Jurgens, Erika Pluhar, Hilde Weissner, Werner Pochath, Marlene Dietrich

More info: IMDb

Plot: After World War I, a war hero returns to Berlin to find that there's no place for him--he has no skills other than what he learned in the army, and can only find menial, low-paying jobs. He decides to become a gigolo to lonely rich women.

My rating: 4/10

Will I watch it again? Heil, No.

In a word, dull.  In a few words, dull as shit.  Maybe not that bad but it's slow and difficult to stay awake.  The first hour keeps dancing between silly comedy and drama and it doesn't work.  The main theme tune gets old fast.  It's hokey and they won't stop using it.  I was really sick of it after the first few short minutes and it was annoying enough to contemplate turning the picture off but I never give up on a picture.

This is the best part of the movie except for the song she sings.  Woof.

It's as if someone saw CABARET (1972) and thought how neat-o it'd be to make their own political statement wrapped in the trappings of post-WWI Berlin with the nightclubs and the live life to the fullest lifestyle.  Bowie is drab.  Rome as Cilly tries but all the trying in the world isn't going to save this film from crawling along.  I didn't care about any of the characters, either.  Curd Jurgens (as the Prince) was as close to enjoyable as you get.  I dig the guy so that brought something to the table.  I'm not certain I know what director Hemmings was going for or what he was trying to say.  It's got one of those cynical 70s endings that suggests 'what a retarded bunch these Nazis are' but I stopped caring a long time ago and had nothing to gain except the movie was finally over.  I don't mean to bash movies sometimes but, damn, this was boring and lifeless and it hurts me that I stuck through all 101 minutes of it.