Nine Deaths of the Ninja (1985)

Director:  Emmett Alston

Writer:  Emmett Alston

Composer:  Cecile Colayco

Starring:  Sho Kosugi, Brent Huff, Emilia Crow, Blackie Dammett, Regina Richardson, Vijay Aritraj, Lisa Friedman, Kan Kosugi, Shane Kosugi, Bruce Fanger

More info:  IMDb

Tagline:  The Ninja Master... is now The Ninja Avenger

Plot:  Two anti-terrorist agents are assigned to free a busload of American schoolchildren in the Philippines who are taken hostage by terrorists.

My rating: 5.5/10

Will I watch it again? No.

It starts with a pre-credit sequence followed by a cheesy pop song during the opening credits trying to be like Bond.

It also stars Vijay Aritraj who was in OCTOPUSSY (1983) just two years earlier (this is his second film role).  After than it goes into standard B-picture action movie mode.  Sho Kosugi provides the best action.  At least the camera lingers long enough on him and his opponent for a while so you can see the choreography.  It's not always a good idea to do that because it can show the slow beats each fighter hits to make it work.  There is no nudity.  Booooo.  But you do get this...

Is she doing it for you?  How about these little fellas?

That scene's not nearly as entertaining as it should've been. And that's one of the issues I have.  Scenes like this little guys fighting the one dude should have been longer and more fun.  This flick needed more creativity.  It's got some decent moments but there's an underlying vibe of just making a movie and not making "the best movie we can".  Had the filmmakers gone that extra mile, this could be a cult classic.  But they'd also have to ditch the guy who plays the main villain who acts like he things he can copy Peter Sellers from DR. STRANGELOVE (1964) because he can't.  He's so fucking annoying that he brings down the picture.  This would've been the kind of movie I would've watched with friends in high school on a Friday night and had a blast with.

Shogun's Shadow (1989)

Director: Yasuo Furuhata

Starring: Ken Ogata, Sonny Chiba, Norihito Arai, Toshihiro Asari, Seizo Fukumoto, Miyuki Kanou, Masaki Kyomoto, Hiroki Matsukata, Takeshi Maya, Hiroyuki Nagato

More info: IMDb

Plot: Iemitsu, Tokugawa Shogun III, hates his eldest son Takechiyo; all his love is given to his younger son Tokumatsu. One day, he orders Takechiyo to an initiation rite in Yedo (today's Tokio). Takechiyo lives far away under the surveillance of Hotta Masamori, head of the Skura clan, where he was also raised. Hotta does suspect some kind of treachery, but he can not ignore the direct command of the Shogun. Therefore, he starts on his travel with Takechiyo and seven accompanying samurais. A large army under the command of Iba Shoemon, a vassal of the Shogun, attacks their night camp in the vicinity of a copper mine. Hotta dies in this first battle, but Takechiyo and the samurai manage to escape. They are chased by the army, and several skirmishes between the small force and the larger army follow.

My rating: 7.5/10

Will I watch it again? Yes.

I digs me some Samurai flicks and this is a good one.  It's funny because I don't think I've seen a bad one yet.  Anyway, There's a ton of action from every direction.Ken Ogata is great as the middle aged samurai, Igo Gyobu, sworn to protect the rightful heir, Takechiyo (Ippei Shigeyama).  His evil adversary is Iba Shoemon (Chiba).  Their showdown is epic and feels like a Western gun duel but with swords.  It's even in the middle of the dirt road in town just like in an American Western.  You'd think the picture would end there but it doesn't.  At first it's a little weird how it keeps going but there's more to the movie than swordplay and killin' folks.  The music score by Masaru Sato is really good even though the orchestral style he chose feels strange for a film like this.  There are three moments (the first doesn't happen until halfway into the picture) where you get 80s hair metal songs as performed by Japanese artists.  We laughed our butts off.  They come out of nowhere and make no sense for this 17th Century flick but it's fun in a bizarre way. 

Chinese Super Ninja (1982)

Director: Chang Cheh

Starring: Cheng Tien-Chi, Lo Meng

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: Five complete elements, one surviving ninja, what could possibly go wrong?

Plot: A young martial artist seeks revenge on the Ninja who kills his martial arts brothers and teacher. He finds help in the form of a new teacher (who knows Ninjitsu) and new brothers. Together the four pupils face the Five Element Ninja challenge: Wood, Earth, Gold, Water, and Fire.

Check out THIS badass trailer. If it doesn't give a kung fu hard on then you're not breathin'.



My Rating: 8/10

Would I watch it again? Chyeah!

I loves me some good kung fu chop socky and this one's right up my alley. The problem the bad one have is there's not enough fighting or there's not much fighting that's entertaining. Well you know right off the bat that there's five elements of evil in this so there's at least five good fights. There's plenty more than that but it's the five elements that steal the show. Each one has a unique look and style and they're all loads of fun.


Sure, the trailer gives away a bit too much but don't let that stop you. After looking this up online I'm pissed to see everything is widescreen and all I've got as a fullscreen copy. I've got to update that. Even in fullscreen it's a total gas to watch.

Here's what you get...

Gold - These ninjas have gold hats that double as Shields and launch knives.
Wood - These ninjas hide inside trees!
Water - These ninjas swim underwater and are also able to skate on top of it.
Fire - These ninjas use colored smoke flares to blind their enemies.
Earth - These ninjas attack from underneath the ground (way fucking cool) first with shooting spears up through the surface then by flying up the the surface to combat their enemies face to face.


They're all fun to watch and after seeing them defeat their enemies it's great to see how they are defeated in the end.

My favorite line?

KUNG FU MASTER: I have been poisoned. I will not be able to use my kung fu for about 3 months.

Classic. Fucking classic. You can't go wrong with shit like that.