Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Witchcraft VI (1994)

AKA: Witchcraft 666: The Devil's Mistress

Director: Julie Davis

Writers: Peter E. Fleming, Julie Davis

Composer: Miriam Cutler

Starring: Jerry Spicer, Debra K. Beatty, Shannon McLeod, Craig Stepp, Kurt Alan, John E. Holiday, Bryan Nutter, Stephanie Swinney, Jennifer Bransford

More info: IMDb

Tagline: The most erotic witchcraft ever

Plot: A serial killer targets young women wearing gold crosses; Detectives Lutz and Garner enlist Will Spanner to help with the occult angles of the case.

My rating: 3/10

Will I watch it again? Absolutely not.

I don't know why I bother with Troma movies anymore.  Every time I watch one I regret it.  Even with the DVD cover stating it's Mr. Skin approved (you know, the site that thrives on nudity in film), it felt like an empty endorsement.  There wasn't THAT much nudity in it.  You get a little in the first few minutes and then it's a good 45+ before you see any more and when you do, it's just little bits here and there.  That's hardly enough to have a big Mr. Skin endorsement on the cover.  The production values are cheap.  They couldn't even make a bar look decent.  The counter in front of the bartender wobbled and they had maybe 8 bottles of booze on the shelf.  It's that kind of 'we don't care' attitude that cheeses me off.  At least try, even if you've only got $80 to work with.  The dialogue is generally poor but there are moments where they're trying for laughs which usually don't work.  The acting is low budget, some bad and some OK.  The scenes move slowly, the main bad guy takes forever to deliver his lines and move, and the music is often non-existent (where it would help the film) and when it's not, it's a below average synth score that just adds to the cheapness of the picture.  At 88 minutes it was twice too long.  They should take a page out of Full Moon's book and not be restricted by the 90 minute run time.  I don't think a Troma movie from the 80s on ever hit the theater.  I'm pretty sure just about everything they've ever made went straight to video.  That means they shouldn't have much reason to want to make their movies that long. What's wrong with an hour?  If it helps the picture, and believe me it would help this picture, then why not keep it shorter.  It'd cost less and that's the kind of thing that seems important to this company.  I won't learn, I'm sure.  Someday I'll watch another movie from this company.  I can say for certain that I'll never see WITCHCRAFT 1-5 or 7-13.  Woof.

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