Monday, January 13, 2014

Sixpack Annie (1975)

Director: Fred G. Thorne

Writers: Norman Winski, David Kidd, Wil David

Composer: Raoul Kraushaar

Starring: Lindsay Bloom, Jana Bellan, Joe Higgins, Larry Mahan, Ray Danton, Richard Kennedy, Danna Hansen, Pedro Gonzalez Gonzalez, Bruce Boxleitner, Sid Melton, Louisa Moritz, Vince Barnett, Steve Randall, Doodles Weaver, Stubby Kaye

More info: IMDb

Tagline: She's Out to Tear the Town Apart!

Plot: Busty, blonde and beautiful, Six-Pack Annie seeks to help her Aunt Tess raise $5,000 for the family trying to find a rich daddy.

My rating: 3/10

Will I watch it again? Oh, Jesus, no.

Fuck me was this obnoxious as hell.  Some people are going to find this funny as shit but you can't count me among them.  Imagine a filthy movie version of HEE HAW.  It's a bottomless pit of one liners, bad puns, sexual innuendos, stereotypes and horrendous Southern accents.  It's also loud and obnoxious.  This is one of the tougher movies I've had to sit through in a long time.  Hey, look, it's Billy Barty!

Fast forward to the last few seconds for the big money shot.  Ugh.  This was rough. There's just a small dusting of nudity.  Surprisingly, there are a few names in this picture like Bruce Boxleitner in his first film role and then you've got the funny as shit and gorgeous Louisa "DEATH RACE 2000 ()" Moritz.  In DEATH RACE she played Stallone's idiot co-driver.  She's about the only bright spot in this picture but it's not enough to save it.  I'll admit that I did chuckle a couple of times but I think it might have been from exhaustion.  I'll give them credit for having one of the most densely joke-laden movies ever made.  Take the challenge and watch it.  I dare ya. 

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