Pets (1974)

Director: Raphael Nussbaum

Starring: Candice Rialson, Joan Blackman, Teri Guzman & Ed Bishop

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: They're All Looking For A Master

Plot: Bonnie (Rialson), after narrowly escaping a gang rape, meets Pat (Guzman) who gets her involved with robbing a man at gunpoint. Wanting nothing to do with that shit, Bonnie splits and is caught stealing an apple from a market vendor by Geraldine (Blackman). Geraldine, an artist, has the hots for Bonnie so she covers for her and pays for the apple when she gets busted by the owner. Bonnie moves in with Geraldine, becoming her lover and muse. When she wants to go out and bag a man, Geraldine objects. Wouldn't you know it but a friend of Geraldine's visits, Victor (played by Bishop), and takes a liking to Bonnie.

But wait, there's more. A burglar breaks into the house and is caught by the two girls. When Geraldine thinks he's gone, Bonnie sneaks him up to her room and spends the night with him...and by spend the night I mean she fucks him. Geraldine, upon discovering this the next morning, kills the burglar and Bonnie runs away. Bonnie runs into Victor and moves in with him whom he now keeps as his pet.

My Rating: 3/10

Would I watch it again? NO

#19 on Dusk to Dawn Drive-In Trash-o-Rama Show Vol. 1 (part of the TRAILER TRASH PROJECT)

So what's this fucking movie called? Pets, right? Bonnie doesn't actually become Victor's pet until 80 minutes into the film! That's just about 20 minutes before the picture is over. AND he doesn't even do any 'pet' things with her. She's just kept in a cage and let out to go to dinner or something. OK so maybe, JUST MAYBE, you could make a case that Geraldine was keeping her as a pet but without a leash or a cage and that Bonnie later becomes a literal pet. I'll buy that, but for an hour and 42 minutes it just sat there, boring the bejesus out of me. Most of the shit you see in the trailer comes from the last ten minutes! Don't be fooled into thinking this could be fun 'cause it ain't!


I recently saw Rialson in HOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD (1976) and she didn't impress me one bit with her performance. I'm not saying that she'd have to but shit it sure would have helped. She's topless in PETS a couple of times which is really about the only thing that's worth a spit in this thing. She does have some nice sweater meat, though.


There's a bit where Pat throws a Benji-dog look-alike of a cliff. That was fucking awesome. The ending was cool which had Bonnie pull a fast one and locked Geraldine and Victor in a cage with a loose tiger in the basement, then leaving the house grabbing some valuables on the way.



And to think that I waited a few weeks to watch this in the chance that I could have gotten my hands on a recently released widescreen print. After not being able to find it I caved in and watched this shitty vhs dub. Either way it sucked and it wasn't worth the wait or the time to watch it. This movie was so bad I considered giving away my dog...and he would have understood why.