Bare Knuckles (1977)

Director: Don Edmonds

Starring: Robert Viharo, Sherry Jackson, Michael Heit, Gloria Hendry and John Daniels

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: Zack Kane - Manhunter Coming At You!

Plot: A bounty hunter in Los Angeles sets out to track down and stop a masked serial killer who murders women.

My Rating: 5/10

Would I watch it again? Nope. Nnnnnno!

OK. So I had this great idea to check out every movie on a particular trailer compilation (MORE ON THAT HERE). Well it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Robert Viharo (playing tough guy, Zachary Kane), looking like Gabe Kaplan of WELCOME BACK KOTTER fame and is about as tough, just doesn't make much of an action lead. Sorry, Bub. His acting style involves a lot of waiting as if the 'cool' is oozing out of him and it's going to bitch-slap us at any moment. Billy Dee Williams, he ain't!


The dialogue is in the 'so bad it's good' category. Check out this choice exchange...

JENNIFER: Who are you?

ZACK: A local wine merchant.

JENNIFER: I don't even know your name.
ZACK: It's Kane.
JENNIFER: Kane?
ZACK: Mmmhmm.
JENNIFER: As in Abel? As in candy? As in citizen?

ZACK: As in blind man's.
JENNIFER: You scare the hell outta me. What do you do?
ZACK: The best I can.

JENNIFER: You could hurt me, ya know?
ZACK: I wouldn't do that.
JENNIFER: Not the me on the outside...the me on the inside; the one nobody sees.

ZACK: I wouldn't do that.

That's the type of thing you get through the entire picture. Kane enlists the help of his friend, Black, who is, uh, um, well...black. He helps Kane out for about 20 or so minutes and then he's gone for the rest of the film. The thing is is that he's set up to be a main character and just vanishes when the plot no longer needs him. WTF??? I know.

"I'm Black...that, too, but it's my name motherfucker!"

We do get not one but TWO montages! And both within the first twenty minutes! The first one shows Kane working out at the gym doing push-ups, sit-ups, punching a bag with a hippie, running and finally he's playing a flute!


Three things of note: he fucking loves those bluejeans as he's in them throughout the entire montage. He's not jogging but running/sprinting (in bluejeans!!!). And the sound you hear during his flute solo is a synthesizer!!!

I was totally on board at this point. The next montage has Kane doing the tedious leg work it takes in trying to locate someone who's gone missing. It was nicely done and I really felt this could be one of those hidden gems you come across every once in a while. Nope, because once he's on the hunt you get a few poorly staged action set pieces (the car chase was an exception, being that it wasn't that bad in comparison) and lots of waiting, it's boring and I found myself reaching for the remote to tell me how much more of this I have to endure.


One really bizarre scene shows Devlin (the serial killer Kane's after) having breakfast with his mother that ends with him kissing her full on the lips. WOW. Did not see that comin'!


Now, the fist fights (hence the title) are slow and clumsy. They could have EASILY fixed that in post with tightening up the editing and adding some crisp contact foley. What a missed opportunity. What they give us feels too loose and silly. The aforementioned car chase comes at the end before the big mano-a-mano fight. Devlin's on a motorcycle and Kane's in a car. Devlin slides and falls off his bike while Mister Kot-taire rolls his car, runs from it, the engine explodes and then the trunk explodes. It's funnier than it is stupid. I loved it. Oh, and they managed to hit every stack of dust-filled cardboard boxes in a ten-mile radius.

...Oh, alright...I'll stick around for the rest of the picture I guess...

KANE: How you doin', Reno?
RENO: What do you want, Kane?
KANE: Is Black in?
RENO: You got a piece?
KANE: Yeah.
RENO: I'll take it.
KANE: You'll have to. (and....wait...)

She sooooo needs to have my babies.

Great stuff but it's not enough to make this that re-watchable, unfortunately. Seriously, I'm having more fun talking about it 24 hours later than I did watching it. Maybe with a few friends this could bump up to a fun 7/10. Take out about a half hour of the shit that just lays there and you've got a flick that's great stupid, cheesy and fun. Otherwise it's just a lot of waiting for a little something every few minutes. I need a bit more to chew on than that. Don't want my M&Ms one at a time and only when someone feels like passing 'em around. Just gimme the bowl.