Underworld (2003)

Director: Len Wiseman

Starring: Kate Beckinsale and a bunch of names I don't recognize

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: An immortal battle for supremacy.

Plot: A war has been raging between the Vampires and Lycan for centuries, Selene (Beckinsale) is a death dealer, assigned to hunt down and eradicate the last of the Lycan. When she comes across Michael Corvin (Speedman)who holds the key to end the war she must decide where her allegiances will lie.

My Rating: 6/10

Would I watch it again? Probably not. Once was enough I think.

I've learned over the years that with certain films you should lower your expectations. You never know what you're going to get. After seeing STAR WARS: THE PHANTOM MENACE (which I did not like) my expectations could not have been any lower than they were for ATTACK OF THE CLONES. As a result I liked CLONES "a little" better than MENACE. I had high anticipation and low expectations for SNAKES ON A PLANE and I loved it - laughed my ass off. So when I popped this in the other night I was surprised that it wasn't as bad as I had expected. It wasn't as good as I would have wanted it to be either.

I'm cool with the story. It's actually pretty cool. What's not cool is:

1) the acting by a few of the lesser characters which I can sometimes tolerate if it doesn't exist side-by-side with...

2) the need for just about every vampire/werewolf to walk around like they're a badass strutting their stuff on a catwalk at a fashion show

3) the voice of Raze, a big muscular guy, which is so low, deep and obviously altered by a computer, I wished they had gone a few more notches so that it would have been so low I couldn't hear it.

Despite all of that I had a relatively good time watching it. The look of the film is great with a good deal of blue tint - nice. The special effects are quite good as well and had a few loud "Cool"'s coming out of my mouth.

I believe this is the first time I've seen Beckinsale in anything. Looking at her credits I see that she was in PEARL HARBOR. I saw it but it' s not like I remember anything about that movie except that it sucked. Maybe if it were called PEARL NECKLACE HARBOR it might have stood out a little more. It was with that film, btw, that I vowed never to forget Michael Bay's name and avoid his turds like the plague. Getting back...I couldn't tell whether or not Beckinsale is a good actress. She's OK in this but, given the role she's playing, she doesn't have much to do in the way of acting. It's mostly a physical role. I did very much like how she fit into that leather/vinyl outfit. She can't weigh more than 80 pounds. It wouldn't hurt her to eat a sandwich with mayonnaise on it once in a while.

I'm sure she won't be showing off any acting chops in UNDERWORLD: EVOLUTION (2006). I'll get around to it at some point. I certainly won't find it in VAN HELSING partly 'cause I ain't gonna see it.