Monte Walsh (1970)

Director: William A. Fraker

Writers: Lukas Heller, David Zelag Goodman, Jack Schaefer

Composer: John Barry

Starring: Lee Marvin, Jeanne Moreau, Jack Palance, Mitchell Ryan, Jim Davis, G.D. Spradlin, John Hudkins, Raymond Guth, John McKee, Michael Conrad, Tom Heaton, Ted Gehring, Bo Hopkins, John McLiam, Richard Farnsworth, Roy Barcroft

More info: IMDb

Tagline:  Monte Walsh is what the West was all about.

Plot: An aging cowboy realizes that the West he knew and loved will soon be no more--and that there will be no room for him, either.

My rating: 8/10

Will I watch it again?  Probably.

I'll watch just about any Western.  I'll definitely watch anything that Lee Marvin or Jack Palance are in, but the two of them together in a Western?  Done!  Holy carp this was good.  The performances are strong and it's great seeing Palance play a good guy for a change.  He's terrific.  He and Marvin have great chemistry together, to the point where you get a real sense that these two characters really are best friends and not play acting.  While it is fun and playful at times, it's also very sad.  It really hit me when Walsh (Marvin) steps just inside the doors of a saloon and there's no one in sight except for the barkeep cleaning the bar top.  Walsh, in a sense, has been abandoned.  The world around him is expanding and changing and it's leaving him behind.  It's a tragic picture that, probably better than any film I've seen, conveys the dying Old West in lieu of progress and change.  I love John Barry but his music in this picture is hit and miss.  The music doesn't fare as well when it's going for a happy mood but it's great when he's conveying the loneliness and sadness of Walsh's predicament.   Good flick.

Observe and Report (2009)

Director: Jody Hill

Writer:  Jody Hill

Composer:  Joseph Stephens

Starring: Seth Rogen, Ray Liotta, Michael Pena, Anna Faris, Dan Bakkedahl, Jesse Plemons, John Yuan, Matt Yuan, Celia Weston, Collette Wolfe, Randy Gambill, Aziz Ansari, Patton Oswalt, Danny McBride

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Right now, the world needs a hero.

Plot:  Bi-polar mall security guard Ronnie Barnhardt is called into action to stop a flasher from turning shopper's paradise into his personal peep show. But when Barnhardt can't bring the culprit to justice, a surly police detective, is recruited to close the case.

My rating: 6.5/10

Will I watch it again?  No.

This picture had me as conflicted as Ronnie (Rogen).  It's definitely a comedy but it's also dipping into dark drama territory.  I enjoyed it and I especially liked the darker moments but then I would've preferred it go even darker or maybe just embrace the drama more than it did.  A good example is Ronnie's takedown in the mall near the end.  It takes a long time to finally stop Ronnie and he's like the Terminator all through it.   I guess it's possible that it would take a dozen cops to take him down but it's unlikely and it's only done that way because it's a movie and he's the main character.  At once it's sad, it's also being a little funny and not taking advantage of the true horror of the situation.  Yeah, I wanted it to go to that dark place and stay there.  They could've even just played it out like Ronnie would've imagined it and then play the same scene as Detective Harrison (who would've give us the real version) saw it.  The film does have some good laughs and Rogen largely gets the character right, even if he does often go too silly.  The supporting cast is good and it's a treat to see Ray Liotta in this.  I dug the picture but it felt like it should've gone farther than it did and go for that rare serious picture that has some humor but it's also got something to say and say it well. 

The Magnificent Seven (1960)

Director: John Sturges

Writer: William Roberts

Composer: Elmer Bernstein

Starring: Yul Brynner, Eli Wallach, Steve McQueen, Charles Bronson, Robert Vaughn, Brad Dexter, James Coburn, Jorge Martinez de Hoyos, Vladimir Sokoloff, Rosenda Monteros, Rico Alaniz, Horst Buchholz, Robert J. Wilke, Val Avery, Whit Bissell, Bing Russell

More info: IMDb

Tagline:  Once You've Met Them...You'll Never Forget Them.

Plot:  An oppressed Mexican peasant village assembles seven gunfighters to help defend their homes.

My rating: 9/10

Will I watch it again?  Yup.

BRONSON'S AGE: 39
LEVEL OF BADASSICITY (10 being the highest): 9

Great flick.  Despite the sometimes cheesy things Chris (Brynner) does, almost all of which is from the beginning until the group sets off on their mission, it's a rock-solid action adventure Western that hits on everything you would expect.  Its got its fair share of cliches but they're far from eye-rollers and they work well for what it is.  It's exciting and funny and it's got an amazing cast, most of which get to shine a few times.  It's hard to believe that at the time Brynner was the biggest star of them all.  In just a few short years many of the rest would become household names.  Elmer Bernstein's score transcended the film and went on to represent the Western genre in the decades since.  This one is truly one of the all time great Westerns and Sturges did a hell of a job with this ensemble cast.  I've seen this one many times over the years but I've yet to see any of the three sequels.  I should do something about that.  The damn things have been sitting on my shelf for years.

Bronson is great and it's easy to see how he would become one of the top stars in the world a decade or so later.  At 39 he's one of the old cats in the film but you'd never know it.  There's a rumor (started right here) that Bronson was such a badass that it caused a tremendous amount of jealousy among the cast and crew.  Women begged daily for his essence.  The men, lead by McQueen and Brynner (not so much Brynner because he had a warehouse full of testosterone that no one else had access to), revolted and all charged Bronson after a long day of shooting.  Bronson cleaned their clocks and how.  Unfortunately a few women jumped into the mix and got served a few knuckle sandwiches themselves.  Bronson doesn't discriminate.  The next day everyone was in line, now knowing their place in Bronson's universe and the picture finished not only early, but under budget.  McQueen donated some of his salary to Bronson's charity, Bronson's Beauties. 

Wild Wild West (1999)

Director: Barry Sonnenfeld

Writers: Jim Thomas, John Thomas, S.S. Wilson, Brent Maddock, Jeffrey Price, Peter S. Seaman

Composer: Elmer Bernstein

Starring: Will Smith, Kevin Kline, Kenneth Branagh, Salma Hayek, M. Emmet Walsh, Ted Levine, Frederique Van Der Wal, Musetta Vander, Sofia, Bai Ling, Garcelle Beauvais, Mike H. McGaughy, Jerry Wills, Rodney A. Grant, Buck Taylor, Ian Abercrombie

More info: IMDb

Tagline: It's a whole new west. July '99.

Plot: Jim West is a guns-a-blazing former Civil War hero. Artemus Gordon is an inventive U.S. Marshal who excels in disguise. When the United States is threatened by psychotic Confederate Arliss Loveless, President Ulysses Grant teams the duo up to bring him to justice. On a hazard-packed train journey from Washington D.C. to Utah, West and Gordon must combine their skills to best Loveless and his diabolical machines.

My rating: 5.5/10

Will I watch it again?  No.

Geez.  I can see why this is so hated.  It's not as bad as I thought it would be as it is entertaining but it's got so much dumb going on I can't believe it was made to begin with.  The story is ridiculous.  I've never seen the show but I do have the entire series that I picked up on the cheap and now I'm keen to start watching it as I'm sure it's not anywhere close to being as stupid as this picture is.  Having a big time star like Will Smith in your film is going to make it more of a Will Smith picture but here, he's half phoning it in.  It doesn't feel like he's giving it much effort and a lot of his line deliveries are lazy and unenthusiastic.  And if you're going to have a black man in the immediate post-Civil War South, which would get him just about nowhere in his investigation, just go along with the conceit that he's just another guy.  I would have rather race not enter into it than to let us believe he's getting away with it.  I loved Branagh in this but I didn't like his no-legs thing and his obsession with everything steampunk spiders.  WAYYYYY over the top but Branagh at least brought some energy and glee to this picture.  Kline is fun but, again, his character is written too over the top.  It's a silly movie with a lot of dumb, dumb, dumb choices with the worst offender being the story.  And for a family-ish Summer popcorn movie, it sure had a shitload of sexual innuendo and bare skin (I'm not complainin', just sayin').  I read that Robert Conrad, the star of the 60s show, loathed this film for its departure from the classic series, making it a mockery instead of an homage or anything close to being respectful to the show.  I'm definitely going to watch the series now, if for no other reason to see how much of an insult this film really is...and hopefully be thoroughly entertained at the same time.

Battle Cry (1955)

Director: Raoul Walsh

Writer: Leon Uris

Composer: Max Steiner

Starring: Van Heflin, Aldo Ray, Mona Freeman, Nancy Olson, James Whitmore, Raymond Massey, Tab Hunter, Dorothy Malone, Anne Francis, William Campbell, John Lupton, L.Q. Jones, Perry Lopez, Fess Parker

More info: IMDb

Tagline: THE SCORCHINGLY PERSONAL BEST-SELLER!

Plot: In World War II, a group of raw recruits join the U.S. Marines. They come from all walks of life and go through boot camp together. After basic training, and are sent to Camp Elliott and the 2nd Battalion of the 6th Marines commanded by Major Sam Huxley. His job is now to make them into an effective fighting unit. They leave family and girlfriends behind but soon meet new people, fall in love and fall out of love. In November 1942, they shipped out arriving first in New Zealand for advanced training and from there on to Guadalcanal. Tarawa is their next mission but Huxley has to pull strings to get his battalion into front line action. He gets his wish with the invasion of Saipan.

My rating: 5.5/10

Will I watch it again?  No.

If you signed up to see this movie...

you'll feel cheated because THIS is what you'll get...

Yeah.  OMFG.  The melodrama is thick and there's very little war action.  I'm not sayin' you can't have pictures like this, there's room for them, but for fuck's sake...don't advertise it with so much war action 'cause there's hardly any.  Yeah, the last 20 minutes deliver on that but that's a drop in the bucket compared to the rest of the picture that runs about two and a half hours.  My only issue with the film is the story filled with love won, lost and so on.  The hardships of the soldiers is touched on from time to time as if they're/we're going to get us a war picture but it's only a tease.  I don't want to be told something happened.  Show me, damnit.  There's maybe 15 minutes of actual war action and that's being generous.  It's probably a little less.  Anyway, this was a real disappointment whether it was my own misguided expectations or this picture really is a drab affair.  They should've called it SOLDIERS CRY or at least something that doesn't elicit, uh, you know, war action.  At least there was this one moment of unexpected satisfaction...

Barabbas (1961)

Director: Richard Fleischer

Writers: Christopher Fry, Par Lagerkvist, Nigel Balchin, Diego Fabbri, Ivo Perilli

Composer: Mario Nascimbene

Starring: Anthony Quinn, Silvana Mangano, Arthur Kennedy, Katy Jurado, Harry Andrews, Vittorio Gassman, Norman Wooland, Valentina Cortese, jack Palance, Ernest Borgnine, Arnoldo Foa, Michael Gwynn

More info: IMDb

Tagline: The motion picture that begins where the other big ones leave off

Plot: Epic account of the thief Barabbas, who was spared crucifixion when Pilate manipulated the crowd into to pardoning him, rather than Jesus. Struggling with his spirituality, Barabbas goes through many ordeals leading him to the gladiatorial arena, where he tries to win his freedom and confront his inner demons.

My rating: 8/10

Will I watch it again? Yes.

I finished the disappointing SOLOMON AND SHEBA (1959) on one day and started this one the next.  SHEBA is a poor example of the Sword & Sandal/Epic film.  The biggest issue is that the lead actors weren't good enough to sell the cheesy, stagy dialogue.  That's not the case with BARABBAS.  First off, it's better written and the acting is MUCH better, too.  The first half of the picture is leisurely paced and you might think it rather slow but I kind of dug it.  The music is sparse but when it's there it's moody, sad and ominous.  All of this is unusual for epic films of this era.  This is the second film I've seen with a Nascimbene score in as many days and I'm really diggin' this guy's work.  It's a completely different score, tonally, than what he provided for SHEBA, and it really suits the picture well.  Quinn delivers a masterful performance.  He doesn't have a massive amount of dialogue like you'd get in other pictures of this genre and era.  He holds back and that works to the film's advantage.  Once he's out of the sulfur mines and he's in gladiator school, the film picks up the pace considerably and we get introduced to Jack Palance's masterful gladiator, Torvald, and he owns that role.  What a badass performance!  The training reminded me of the previous year's SPARTACUS (1960) and the gladiatorial matches are nicely handled and fun as hell.  It's this final third of the film that's the most fun. Naturally, being what this movie is about, religion is all through it.  I don't believe a word of it but I still really enjoyed the picture.  It's well written, scored, acted, directed, great location shooting and sets, the works.  The Columbia DVD has a great looking anamorphic widescreen print with the only extra being the trailer.  

Dave Attell: Road Work (2014)

Director: Scott Gawlik

Staring: Dave Attell

More info: IMDb

Plot: Veteran New York City comic Dave Attell is back with his Comedy Central stand-up special "Road Work." This unique special cuts together multiple performances from Attell's past tour. From New Orleans to Philadelphia to Minneapolis and more, "Road Work" feels more like a concert film than a traditional stand-up special. Of course, it wouldn't be a proper Attell show without his expert crowd work and clever R-rated material in what he calls "a filthy, dirty mess of a show."

My rating:9/10

Will I watch it again? Yes.

After watching the incredibly unfunny CHRIS TUCKER LIVE (2015) I had to get some laughs from somewhere (on Netflix streaming) and this one came up.  I love Attell.  I've never not laughed my ass off to his shit.  He's so outrageously vulgar and his jokes zig zag all over the place and the guy is lightning fast with the laughs.  The sad thing is this is only 40 minutes long but the good thing is it's loaded with laughs.  I'd love to see this cat live.  If you're into highly inappropriate funny then this guy is your ambassador.