Beneath the Valley of the Ultra-Vixens (1979)

Director: Russ Meyer

Starring: Kitten Natividad, Ann Marie, Ken Kerr, June Mack, Patrick M. Wright, Henry Rowland, Robert E. Pearson, Michael Finn, Sharon Ceccatti, Don Scarborough, Aram Katcher, DeForest Covan, Steve Tracy, Uschi Digard, Stuart Lancaster, Candy Samples

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Six Chicks in search of a Cluck! ...and so hilariously funny!

Plot: Believe it or not even in Smalltown USA there are still people who are unfulfilled and unrelieved in the midst of plenty. Levonna & Lamar could have the perfect relationship if it were not Lamar's obsession with rear entry. After submitting to the one last time Levonna comes up with a plan. While Lamar is trying find other tail to try his technique on, Levonna becomes Lola with aid of a wig and a Mexican accent. A Mexican cocktail later Lola finally has Lamar straight, but he wasn't awake for it. The gay marriage counselor, attracted to Lamar's problem, couldn't help them and Lemar must finally seek redemption at the church of Rio Dio Radio and the laying on of hands by Sister Eufaula Roo.

My rating: 6/10

Will I watch it again? Probably not.


I love Russ Meyer, if for no other reason, because his style is unique. I've never seen anyone else make movies like he did. The dialogue is fast and fun, there's a lot going on his films and, of course, there are the gargantuan jungle drums of his female cast. It's been a while since I saw this one and it all came rushing back to me why I didn't like this picture as much as I wanted to. Like SUPERVIXENS (1975), BENEATH suffers from being too long (even at 93 minutes!) and the music is too busy and constant. I know, I know, with a picture loaded with HH cups how did I even notice the music? I'm weird that way, I guess. While I'm at it, Ann Marie's high-pitched radio bits are hard to listen to after a couple of times and there are tons.


The big draw (hahaha) for this picture, though, is Kitten "5'3" 44DD-25-35" Natividad. I-chi-wawa! Her chichis are world class and she must have had the Michelangelo of plastic surgeons because she came from a 34B to this and they look as natural as Tura Satana wanting to have my babies.


Like a lot of Meyer's films, there's a lot of outrageous humor. He's over the top but in a way that's unlike anyone else and he gets a great performance (as always) out of Stuart Lancaster. I love that guy. He's got a great old man look and voice. I swear I'll probably make a project someday of watching all of his movies (all 29 of 'em).


You really need to see some of Meyer's pictures from the 60s and 70s. For the most part they're fun. His opus is the fantastic FASTER, PUSSYCAT! KILL! KILL! (1965). It's definitely his finest hour (and 23 minutes). This, however, is not but it's more entertaining than a most soft core comedies of the 70s, and boy can that man make an entertaining trailer! This was Meyer's last picture.

SuperVixens (1975)

Director: Russ Meyer

Starring: Shari Eubank, Charles Napier, Uschi "Yummy" Digard, Charles Pitts, and enough boobs to fill the Senate.

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: Too much...for one movie!

Plot: Clint Ramsey has to leave his job working at Martin Bormann's gas station and flee after his wife is murdered by psycho cop Harry Sledge, who tries to pin the murder on Clint. Crossing America, Clint gets sexually harassed on all sides by various voluptuous nymphomaniacs, and it all ends in a literally explosive climax.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW TRAILER

My Rating: 6.5/10

Would I watch it again? It's not likely

I've seen bits and pieces of this over the years and I've finally watched the entire film start to finish. I should have stuck with the bits and pieces. I really like Meyer's style. He's different, independent, his dialogue is groovy, some of his shots are masterful and some of his movies are fun. FASTER, PUSSYCAT! KILL! KILL! (1965) is one of the greatest movies of all time.

For those of you not familiar with Meyer, he likes his women on the natural busty side.

MEET THE SUPERS!

SuperAngel and...

SuperVixen

SuperLorna

SuperHaji

SuperEula

SuperCherry

And my favorite...

SuperSoul

With SUPERVIXENS, he's kind of back in form with what he did on FASTER. There are some truly riotous moments in this. Just about the entire farm sequence is a howler. That's the most solid 10 minutes of the film (which happens to feature Uschi "Yummy, Yummy, Yummi" Digard as SuperSoul. The rest of the bloated one hour and forty-six minute run time is only sometimes funny.

Charles Napier is sleazy as hell and is a blast to watch as the sadistic cop looking for kicks. He's popped up a few times in Meyer's films. So has Stuart Lancaster, the old man married, here, to SuperSoul. He's always a hoot to watch.


I know what you're sayin', "Hey, Scorethefilm! This sounds like a winner. Where do I sign up? What's not to like?" Well, and boy is this going to sound stupid considering, the music sucks. William Loose has written one of the most obnoxious, over-the-top, assault to the ears I've come across. It's so Mickey-Mousey with slide whistles and a truck load of auxiliary percussion. It's so cartooney to the extreme that after a half hour you want this Clockwork Orange experiment to stop.

It's almost as if this were a live action FAMILY GUY episode but all of the main characters of the cartoon are replaced by boobs. There's quick cut-scenes and outrageous imagery and situations. It wouldn't surprise me if Seth McFarlane is a Russ Meyer fan and Quagmire isn't on the screen but seated among dozens of other Quagmires in a crowded movie house. I can just imaging hearing G-G-Giggidy giggidy giggidy for 106 miutes straight. I should make a commentary track for this as Quagmire. That could be fun. Maybe not.


SUPERVIXENS isn't quite the success I was hoping for. At 70 or so minutes I'd be praising it left and right but staying to the end of 106 is asking too much considering the score and the pacing issues. I dug it but I can't see myself seeing it again. I'll probably just go back to catching bits and pieces of it.