Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Shoot the Living and Pray for the Dead (1971)


Director: Giuseppe Vari

Starring: Klaus Kinski, Paolo Casella

More Info: IMDB

Plot: Dan Hogan and his gang have held up a bank for $100,000 in gold bars. They meet up at Jackal's Ranch, a weigh station for stage coaches. While waiting for the gold to arrive they encounter a stranger, John Webb, who wants half the gold in exchange for guiding them safely to Mexico. Reluctantly, Dan agrees and they set across the brutal desert for a race to the border with the Rangers hot on their tail. Is John who he says he is? Is he really after the gold or does he have an ulterior motive?



My Rating: 5/10

Would I watch it again? Nope.

Strange film for a Spaghetti Western. The opening credits (SEE ABOVE) feature a very unusual theme song that sounds like it'd be more at home in an early 70s disaster movie. And if you think that's slow, just watch the rest of the movie. Woof.

It's not so much that it's slow than it essentially has two locales. The first 48 minutes almost entirely takes place in a stage coach weigh station with the remaining 42 traipsing across the hot desert. It's pretty easy to get cabin fever with something like that.


One of the breaks in monotony during the first half occurs when Dan's gang (Dan hasn't made it there yet) is holed up in the weigh station when a stage coach arrives with three passengers, two being a husband (Oswald) and wife (Eleanor). Naturally, they want to leave and Eleanor's wealthy husband trys to bargain with the man who's holding them captive. Oswald ends up handing his wallet over to the bandit. Eleanor laughs maniacally and says with well-practiced bitch-like precision, "Now you can't buy anything with your money. Hahahahahaha!" to which he replies glaring at her, "I'm used to getting nothing for my money, especially where women are concerned." Oh, snap!

The first half reminds me of a similar situation in THE PETRIFIED FOREST (1936) with Bogart and his boys holding a handful of characters hostage in a California desert roadside bar.


Not bad for several days' ride through the desert, eh?

Not too long after Dan (Kinski) shows up he tries to make the moves on Eleanor and she's not very receptive. Later, after they're on the run, they all make refuge from a storm in a cave. He calls her to where he's sleeping and tells her it's time to pay her debt. She throws some bitch lines at him and finally complies, all the while insulting him. So Dan excuses himself and visits the bandit who's keeping watch to tell him that he can take the next hour off and go "collect the debt" waiting at his bunk and to also tell the next bandit to do the same when he's finished. That's a particularly nasty scene with a little bite to it.


Another memorable scene involves Eleanor running away from the group with Dan chasing after her. She runs right into a small area of quicksand and Dan backs off and plants himself down to gleefully watch her die as she suddenly changes her acerbic tone and pleads for her life, telling Dan that she now loves him. Ahahahahaha.


Dan Hogan's got the best seat in the house.


The performances are fine. Nobody stands out good or bad, really. Mario Migliardi's score is low-key and at times strange, even for a Spag, like when they're travelling across the hot, baren desert he's using marimbas and egg shakers!!! WTF? It strangely works but I couldn't help but feel that there could have been many possibilities that would have made the film feel not so slow.


Overall, that's what kills it - the pacing. It looked good, had good performances, director Vari throws in some really neat camera angles (that stand out even in a Spaghetti Western!) and an interesting (if you can call it that) score but the story was a one-way ticket to Snoozeville. There are a hell of a lot worse Spags than this but that doesn't help this particular film. Give it a pass. Move along 'cause there's nothing to see here.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

The Fly (1986)


Director: David Cronenberg

Starring: Jeff Goldblum, Geena Davis, John Getz

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Plot: A brilliant but eccentric scientist begins to transform into a giant man/fly hybrid after one of his experiments goes horribly wrong.



My Rating: 9/10

Would I watch it again? YES

I can't believe it took me 22 years to get around to watching this. I've been missing out. What a fantastic horror movie. It's easily one of the best of the past 30 years.


"Derp"

Great main title sequence with a superb score by Howard Shore. Amazing makeup effects. When Seth goes over to the dark side HE GOES OVER. The arm wrestling scene is awesome. Seth's gymnastics scene is a piece of work. I just goes to show you what is possible without CGI. I miss practical/optical effects. And Jeff Goldblum was born to play this role. WOW! Plus this has one of the most iconic and accurate taglines EVER.

" 'Cause this is thriller, thriller night."

And the most amazing part of it (OK, I'm exaggerating here but it's still amazing)? When Seth is typing on his computer and you see the characters on the computer screen...THERE'S NO BEEPING! Just the sound of actual typing. That's one of my pet peeves is hearing sounds on a computer where in the real world there are no sounds. Ugh. Cronnenberg is my new hero just based on that alone. Never mind that this is a tremendous achievement in horror.

The Vampire Lovers (1970)


Director: Roy Ward Baker

Starring: Ingrid Pitt, Peter Cushing

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: An erotic nightmare of tormented lusts that throb in headless, undead bodies!

Plot: Marcilla Karnstein from time to time comes back from her death sleep, and under a different name, such as Carmilla or, now, Mircalla, spreads terror in a village with her vampire powers. General Von Spielsdorf loses his nubile daughter to Mircalla, and swears revenge, with the help of expert vampire-killer Baron Hartog, and the Doctor. Eventually, they will kill the female vampire, but not before she traps a number of female lovers/victims.



My Rating: 8/10

Would I watch it again? Yyyyyyyes!

#44 on Hammer Horror (1957-1976)

Come for the lovely pre-credit beheading and stay for the lesbian vampires. That would be the tagline I would rather see. At least it's honest.

TVL is the first in a trilogy of Karnstein vampire films made by the Hammer Studio. It is followed by LUST FOR A VAMPIRE (1971) and TWINS OF EVIL (1971).

Now THERE'S a religion I could get into!



TVL was made to showcase several beautiful European vampire women that were born to have my babies. I was taken aback at the number of unbelievably striking women Hammer has in this film.

Breathtakingly beautiful women, wouldn't you say? They're much prettier than just about everyone in Hollywood these days. No one comes close. Well, except for Sandra Bernhard but that's another story.

It's a pretty good film flawed with pacing issues but the eye candy is what keeps this re-watchable. Now, I haven't seen everything Hammer did leading up to this (yet) but I'm guessing the nudity cat was let out of the bag and they exploited it to the fullest. Case in point. There's a scene where a nubile young woman is bed-ridden due to a vampire bite. The doctor needs to check her (and now my) pulse. So what does he do? He pulls the portion of her nightgown over her breast and places the stethoscope BELOW her beast, not above it!!! Busted! What a blatant use of nudity for the sake of nudity. It garners a laugh and then right into an "ahhhhh". Way to go Roy Ward Baker!

You're getting warmer, doc.

It's not close to being Hammer's vampire best but if you're looking for an erotic, Gothic, vampire lesbian film (and there are TONS out there), I would recommend this one as a tamer entry into the vampire sub genre and then work your way up to the other early to mid-seventies European goodies like VAMPYRES (1974). Boy, do I love movies.

Dracula: Prince of Darkness (1966)


Director: Terence Fisher

Starring: Christopher Lee, Andrew Keir, Barbara Shelley

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: Bloodthirsty Vampire Lives Again!

Plot: Two couples traveling in eastern Europe decide to visit Carlstad despite dire local warnings. Left outside the village by a coachman terrified at the approach of night, they find themselves in the local castle and are surprised at the hospitality extended by the sinister Klove. It turns out the owner, Count Dracula, dead for ten years, has been hoping for such a visit.



My Rating: 8/10

Would I watch it again? as sure as D keeps getting resurrected

#26 on Hammer Horror (1957-1976)


It's 1966, 8 years since the first Hammer Dracula picture (with Lee as the Count) and Christopher Lee is back for his first (Hammer's second) Dracula sequel. There was much rejoicing. Yeah. Lee was a douche and didn't want to get stuck in that role so he put off reprising it after '58. What a dope. Fortunately he wised-up and from 1966 through the 70s played Dracula several more times.


What a gas this one is. It starts out recouping the last few minutes of the '58 film and D's demise. Cut to the credits and now we have to wait another 40 minutes until the blood sucker shows up, re-instated. But it's not like is presence isn't felt or anything.

Andrew Keir gives a great performance as the priest that interferes to stop D. Francis Matthews gives a funny performance to the point that you'd almost swear it's Cary Grant. And Barbara Shelley is a major cutie. She should've had my babies.


As always, the wonderful James Bernard score adds a thick, rich layer over Fisher's visuals giving the film it's iconic feel.

And probably the coolest scene in the film has Dracula's keeper, Klove, hanging a lucky victim upside down over a coffin with D's ashes/remains. He slashes the victim's throat to gushingly soak the remains to bring Dracula back to life. Fucking sweet.


I really love a lot of these Hammer horror films. I'm particularly fond of the rich Gothic atmosphere they create. They're not all gems but most of the one I've seen are worthy of repeat viewings, especially when I'm hungry for something I know I will enjoy on a dark, quiet night with a glass or two (or three or four) of red wine.

Here's the list of the Hammer Dracula films:

Horror of Dracula (1958)
The Brides of Dracula (1960)
Dracula: Prince of Darkness (1966)
Dracula Has Risen from the Grave (1968)
Taste the Blood of Dracula (1969)
Scars of Dracula (1970)
Dracula AD 1972 (1972)
The Satanic Rites of Dracula (1973)
The Legend of the 7 Golden Vampires (1974)

The Star Dreamer (2002)


Director: Mads Baastrup & Sonja Vesterholt

Staring: Pavel Klushantsev

More Info: IMDB

Plot: This is the story of the ground-breaking Russian film maker, Pavel Klushantsev was a visual wizard and left a fantastic legacy of films which transformed and influenced the science fiction genre as we know it.





My Rating: 9/10

Would I watch it again? Yup


I was so taken by this film a couple of years ago that I slapped it in for some friends between movies one night and it was a big hit. At 54 minutes you get a solid glimpse into the joys and hardships PK experienced behind the Iron Curtain in the 1050s and 60s. It's sad that the Russian government treated him so poorly but at least we have the amazing films he did manage to complete.


His vision and innovative special effects techniques are extraordinary and his films are visual works of art. Many of the techniques featured in Stanley Kubrick's 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY (1968) that are accredited to Kubrick were surprisingly achieved and pioneered by PK ten years earlier. We get to see how many of these shots were created in detail and the sheer simplicity of it all, much like the revealing of a magic trick, leaves you in awe. I don't know where this Danish documentary can be found but seek it out. It's a neat glimpse into an era long gone and into the life of a man whose contribution to science fiction film making can be felt to this day.

No Country for Old Men (2007)


Director: Joel & Ethan Coen

Starring: Tommy Lee Jones, Josh Brolin, Javier Bardem

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: There Are No Clean Getaways

Plot: Violence and mayhem ensue after a hunter stumbles upon some dead bodies, a stash of heroin and more than $2 million in cash near the Rio Grande.



My Rating: 10/10

Would I watch it again? duh

Not much to say about this. It's amazing. Every aspect is magnificent. The cinematography, the look, the feel, the acting, the very sparse score (which is nice for a film to know when NOT to use music, and I am a film music freak), the script and dialogue, line deliveries, Bardem's star-making role. It's the Coen brothers' most mature film to date. These guys are amazing.


The Blu-ray disc is breathtaking. My computer doesn't have a BR drive so no screen shots are from the disc. I popped it in to show someone how great BR looks during the first few minutes and we all ended up glued till the end (and for most of us it was the 2nd or 3rd viewing). It's a remarkable picture that deserves your attention.

Anton Chigurh: What's the most you ever lost on a coin toss?

Equilibrium (2002)


Director: Kurt Wimmer

Starring: Christian Bale, Sean Bean, Taye Diggs, William Fichtner, Emily Watson, Angus Macfadyen

More Info: IMDB

Tagline: In a future where freedom is outlawed outlaws will become heroes.

Plot: In a futuristic world, a strict regime has eliminated war by suppressing emotions: books, art and music are strictly forbidden and feeling is a crime punishable by death. Cleric John Preston (Bale) is a top ranking government agent responsible for destroying those who resist the rules. Whe he misses a dose of Prozium, a mind-altering drug that hinders emotion, Preston, who has been trained to enforce the strict laws of the new regime, suddenly becomes the only person capable of overthrowing it.



My Rating: 9/10

Would I watch it again? Shit, yeah!

Lousy tagline. Great movie.

I've repeatedly heard this compared to THE MATRIX. Why? I don't know. I just watched this for the fourth or fifth time and I just don't see it. Maybe it's the look of the film and that the main characters wear black. The poster art doesn't help distinguish it. If anything it's more related to FAHRENHEIT 451 (1966) than anything else. And that's just because it's a futuristic tale where emotion has been suppressed by the government. Outside of that we're looking at a major contribution to a bleak future where humans are more robotic than human. It ain't pretty, folks.


Bale makes this picture. If you stuck 'Ole Woodenhead (Keanu Reeves) in this it would be retarded. Bale is surrounded by a great cast and crew. There are several HOLY SHIT moments in this that it will beg you for more viewings. The special effects are fun and unique, the new fighting style of Gun Fu is neat and the ending is a jump up and scream kind of climax. Mmmmmm.

Klaus Badelt's score works great, too. Emily Watson is either miscast or her look is off. I'm too tired to give it much thought.


One thing I REALLY like about this movie is the action/fight scenes are cut in such a way that YOU CAN FREAKIN' SEE WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON! I'm so tired of modern films using the shaky cam/quick edits to cover up the lack of talent and skill of the film makers. With this picture you're allowed to see every move and soak in the experience without sacrificing its effectiveness. Nicely, nicely.


Now, I liked the first MATRIX movie A LOT (the sequels were terrible) but EQUILIBRIUM is even better. Highly recommended.